


Songbird

by dorkpatroller



Category: Fire Emblem: If | Fire Emblem: Fates, Fire Emblem: Kakusei | Fire Emblem: Awakening
Genre: A little gore, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Blood, Curses, Don't get me wrong, Hallucinations, Horror, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Multi, Muteness, Other minor characters - Freeform, Premonitions, Spirit Pact, Threesome - M/M/M, Unease, and you're judging me, but trust me, deals with a demon - Freeform, i know you're looking at that archive warning, like theres some freaky shit in here, some body horror too, there is fluff in here too tho, tucked away
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-14
Updated: 2019-02-16
Packaged: 2019-10-09 19:11:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 6
Words: 27,588
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17412602
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dorkpatroller/pseuds/dorkpatroller
Summary: In order to save the lives of the men he loves most, Odin creates a spirit pact, or a deal with a demon. If the demon gives him the power to save their lives, he'll let it take his. Of course, no one is willing to just sit around and let Odin Dark die so easily.





	1. Once You Cross That Line Then You Are Lost

_I crossed that line, the line reserved for angels._

_Once you cross that line then you are lost._

 

In Nohr, the parties have always been extravagant. From the first day Odin arrived, several years ago, he found it odd. In a country so ravaged by war and with so many poor and hungry people, it didn’t make much sense to him why they would waste their limited resources on luxuries like that. Of course, given time he came to learn the truth. King Xander and Prince Leo have always organized and hosted the parties. It gives their people a sense of hope. They're able to feed them, give them a good drink, and lift their spirits, if only temporarily.

It reminds Odin of the festivals his mother dragged him to in the middle of the war against Grima, and how he felt a sense of relief and normalcy in the chaos. He finds that he can support extravagant parties when they provide a ray of hope.

Then again, this ball is a little bit different. This is the coronation ball for King Xander, and now that he's taken his throne Nohr is destined to see a much happier future. There are all sorts here, both that Odin is familiar with and some he is not. The royal siblings of Hoshido and all of their families, as well as Liege Corrin and Lady Azura of Valla,  are all present. Nohrian nobility that isn’t particularly royalty, castle staff bustling in and out, and even the cheers of the less noble in the streets of Windmire. The whole country is celebrating as their new, capable leader takes over the role so badly abused by his irrational father.

Everyone is dressed and made up for the occasion. The crown's passage from one king to the next is a momentous occasion on a good day, and in Nohr, it was long overdue. Odin is thrilled to witness it! They've all worked hard for this, but the three of them who came from Ylisse have worked harder than any. They've waited years to see the fall of Anankos and the rise of peace. The crown sitting on King Xander’s head is a symbol of that peace. Odin is beginning to think he should put slaying dragons on his resume.

Of course, that would imply that he was looking for a job, and he's certainly not. He's sworn his life to Prince Leo, and while he pledged that fealty under the impression that he would one day break it to return to his homeland...he doesn't know that to be true anymore.

He's had a long time to think about this, of course. Years and years. His mother and father are dead, that's the cold truth. The parents he left behind when he journeyed here were a close second to his real family, but by now he's certain they have their own Owain to keep them busy. He doesn't have a homeland to go back to or a life in the Ylisse of the past to return to. He has a life _here_ though.

Not to mention it would break his heart to leave them. Leo and Niles, that is. They're always the first and last things on his mind, from the moment he wakes to the time he lays his head down to sleep. When this war ended he told himself he would make his decision to go or stay by the time the coronation arrived. He made his decision long before the war ended, though, he just needed to come to terms with it.

The first time Odin realized that Niles and Lord Leo were in a relationship was a mess. He'd forgotten an old grimoire on Leo's desk. Leo told him he would be retiring to his bed for the evening and Odin thought he could slip into his quarters unnoticed and retrieve the book without Leo ever knowing the difference. After all, his suite is quite large and his bedroom is in the very back, behind a door where he wouldn't even notice Odin at all.

Needless to say, he was not _in_ his bedroom, but being pushed back over his desk by Niles. Odin isn’t even sure which tongue belonged to which mouth, but he abruptly removed himself from the room with the slam of a door and just the echo of Niles's voice calling after him.

Later, the following day, he was treated to a lecture by the both of them and sworn to secrecy. Odin is a master with secrets, and he would never betray their trust. Niles and Leo are in love, and they deserve all the happiness in this world. They're Odin's best friends that he’s made here in Nohr. They also happen to be the two men Odin loves most in this whole _world_ … and the fact that the two of them are not only both taken, but taken _mutually…_ well, it hurts.

It's not that he fell in love out of jealousy. He was falling for them long before that. Sometimes Odin thinks back to the story of how his parents met. It's very cliche. His father was just found in a field, not many people trusted him, but his mother did. So he dedicated his life to protect her, and that dedication grew into an untamed affection over time. Sure there were pranks and frogs and rainy days, but when the feelings finally surfaced their love couldn't be contained! Odin thought it was odd that dedicating yourself to protect someone could ever cause you to fall in love with them, at the time. Wouldn’t that make them feel like a chore?

He knows how simple it is now. He loves Leo so badly it hurts! From the gentle sway of his hips, while he’s pacing, down to the tiniest flicker of a smile on his face when he's holding in a laugh, Odin loves Leo from head to toe.

And he certainly loves Niles too. There's something magical about him. Looking at Niles when he has his guard down is like looking directly into the stars. He shines with _this_ power, a power that he may not even know he has, energy and a passion that's _celestial_. He hit rock bottom in this life but he kicked and clawed his way back up to where he sits now, lighting the sky as a star in the loving arms of the prince of Nohr.

Odin is truly, wonderfully, happy for them. Nothing could stop that happiness either. He doesn't mind. When it's the three of them alone now and then the two of them will share a sneaky, affectionate glance. He’s seen Niles squeeze Leo’s hand to reassure him, he’s even seen Leo lean off of his horse and kiss Niles over his bangs. It was the first time, in perhaps his whole life, that Odin ever saw Niles blush. Odin doesn't mind when they’re soft, around him. There's always a small twinge of a pain in the back of his chest, a curse of jealousy that he's always just a little ashamed to admit. He feels like the odd man out, but he's just glad to see them smile.

Niles has been wearing a ring on his finger for this past week. Odin doesn't want to make assumptions, but he's not afraid to state the obvious. With the war ended and Xander's son already a year old, Nohr's future is properly secure. There will be a king, an heir, and likely several other heirs when Camilla and Elise grow into starting families of their own. Leo is off the hook--free to marry Niles--and the burden of an heir isn't on his shoulders.

Odin is thrilled. He'll make certain that their wedding is the stuff of legends, should they want it to be! They surely haven't announced it yet. It would be wrong to overshadow the celebration at hand, but when they _do_ he'll be happy to brag about his two best friends and their happy relationship. Will Niles become a prince? Will they adopt any children? Niles once confided in Odin that he has a soft spot for kids.

And so, Odin knows first-hand that the love shared between a retainer and his liege can be unstoppable. It drives him forward every day of his life. Of course, Odin has already decided he will take on the role of watching over Niles as well. The shift in his role from the retainer to the husband of the prince will likely cause a small uproar. Just because Nohr is at peace doesn't mean it doesn't still need help. Not everyone trusts the royal family yet. Even fewer people trust Niles at first glance… and they probably already know they'll have to be on high alert for any attempts on either of their lives.

Odin suspected there would be an assassination attempt or two in the _future_ , where he might have to lay down his own life to protect Leo or even Niles if need be. To secure their future, together. To secure their happiness, that they live on to bring light into each other's eyes as they always do. Odin wants to see them happy until the day he dies. Yes, he suspected an attempt on one or both of their lives. He did not expect it to happen tonight, at the King's ball.

It's well into the evening when it happens. It's always dark and cold out at night here in Windmire, but a storm picks up outside. It doesn't initially interfere with the party, but mere minutes pass before the wind is howling so loudly that it's rattling the doors and drowning out the music.

A chill settles over the ballroom. At first, Odin pays it no mind, but something alarming comes over him like a heavy sense of dread settling into his bones. The hair at his neck stands up, his skin tingles, and there's a distinct tension in the air. A tension he isn't unaccustomed to creating himself. _Lightning_.

Even then he barely has enough time to worry about the lightning when a more immediate threat appears. The glass doors rattle even harder in their frames until they burst open at the seams. Rain and ice and a dark, purple aura all pour into the ballroom. Shouts and screams fill the air and a small stampede of finely dressed men and women in puffy shirts and gowns push and tug past Odin. When they clear out he finds himself surrounded by the most familiar faces. Laslow, dressed to the nines and wearing an uncertain frown has a rapier tied at his waist and his hand firmly planted on it. Peri is dressed in armor as always, but it shines brighter than normal. It's more formal in design and there are simply no dents. Their new king had these outfits commissioned for them, for his coronation.

Niles is to his left, positioned half in front of Prince Leo—as he should be. He's not wearing anything half as fancy as Laslow, but he's been dressed in a black, silky cape with intricate silver embroidery. Odin wears a similar vest and pants. He wanted a cape but Leo only let Niles have one as a means to cover up the short bow and quiver that he intended to wear. After all, none of them are quite stupid enough to come unarmed to a gathering of this caliber.

Xander shouts and his booming voice echoes eerily off of the evacuated ballroom. "Show yourself!" he calls. It bounces off Odin's heart like a drumbeat. No one responds. From his pocket, Odin pulls a tome. It’s not large, but it’s certainly not weak. He suspects this book will guide his hand to keeping his liege safe. There is only one problem.

At once every single tome in the room dissolves to ashes. It doesn't burn, but Odin looks down at his hands and the black soot covering them. He looks up again when he hears Laslow yelp. The sword in his hand falls to the ground as wriggling snake with a tail that rattles at the end. He takes several steps back, never one to be fond of creepy crawlies, but his shock is more directed at the spell.

Niles gasps and when Odin turns his head he's fumbling to pull his cape off, struggling to get to the quiver hidden beneath off his shoulders. Smaller snakes, black like oil, glide over his body all the while. Leo is closest to him and he catches the buckle of the quiver in his hand and attempts to rip it off.

No one has weapons now and the room is clouded and thick with dark, chaotic spells that none of them can identify. Who is behind this? Who could turn their metal into life? Peri and Laslow have made a hasty retreat. They rush towards his majesty and usher him to escape, for he never had a weapon to start with. Odin wonders what would have happened had Leo been holding his divine tome and not some throwaway Elwind. Would the magic of Brynhildr also turn to ash? Would Xander's noble Siegfried become a writhing snake?

He shudders, but now that the king is safely out of reach he realizes a new horror: the lightning he could smell earlier is building in tension, burning in his nostrils. Can't they feel it? All they can focus on is Leo slinging Niles's quiver across the floor like it’s personally wronged him and Niles patting himself down, trying to rid himself of any lingering pests. They're too distracted by the issue at the forefront to see the coming storm.

A whirlwind of purple and black swirls around the two of them. Only then does Niles react, reaching out to try and push through the barrier. Leo shouts but Odin can't _hear him_. His words are lost to the spinning spell like it's sucked the voice right out of his throat. He can see cuts form on his clothes, a thin slice of blood along Niles's cheek, where the wind whips them and lashes out. Then, against all odds, the situation becomes even graver.

Above them, dark clouds begin to form in the tension. Now they're trapped within a magic storm and they're sure to be electrocuted with a blast so strong it could kill them both. Odin can barely entertain the idea. Just the concept is enough to make his heart sag. The two men he loves most in this world, ended before they can even share their vows with each other?

His knees buckle. He feels completely helpless at that moment, but then a voice calls out to the back of his mind. _You can still save them._

How? He would do anything. It's only been a fraction of a second but the idea of Niles's lopsided smile or Leo's proud hums being gone from this world forever might kill him.

_Let me save them. I can give you the power._

Oh. It's a spirit. For a breath of a moment, he hears the sound of his father's voice, calmly but sternly reminding him that no amount of power is worth his own life. Then again, the idea that perhaps, in his moment of weakness, he can save the men he loves… that _is_ worth it. Two lives certainly weigh heavier than one. There are no other options. He has no tome, but this potential power might fix all of it. Yes, this is what he wants.  He surrenders to it.

The energy he feels in that moment is enough to fill up his chest and explode out of his fingertips. Sparkling, crackling bolts of lightning burst from his hands, from his eyes, his mouth. It burns, it feels like knives slicing through him, pins under his fingernails and his eyelids, and worse yet he can't even see what it's doing. Is it cutting through the darkness? Will it destroy the threat to Niles and Leo? Odin can't see. His vision is made up entirely of popping lights that burn like he’s staring at the sun. He’s afraid. He needs to squeeze his eyes shut and hide before it blinds him, but he can't blink. He can't stop it. The only relief from the heat of the magic are the tears tracking down his cheeks and dry sobs that allow him to breathe, somehow, between gagging on this spell pouring out of his mouth.  

When it's all said and done Odin has fainted, but Leo and Niles must be alright. No mage ever makes a deal with a spirit without getting what they've bargained for, after all.

…

When he wakes his throat is raw. Or maybe burned from the inside. He's in bed, undressed down to his smallclothes, and the only blanket over him is a thin sheet on his legs. He thinks he's on fire. Maybe he's burning up _right now_.

"There he is," Niles says. He hears the clap of his boots hitting the floor while he slides out of a chair and walks closer. Odin barely has his eyes open, but Niles pushes his hand back through his bangs and that engagement band on his finger is so chilled that it makes his eyes open wide. It's such a gentle touch! It makes his heart race--but only to make him feel lightheaded. "Eyes open and everything. Milord, I think he's alright."

"For now," Leo says. "But thank the gods." Odin's eyes are still blurry and teary, but he catches Leo walk closer. He's a tall, thin, black blob… and, actually, so is Niles. Oh. They're still in their formalwear. Good, he must not have been out long. He would hate to worry them too badly.

The bed shifts to the side and Odin thinks he might just roll off it, but he doesn't. The only change is Leo's weight, seated beside him, and his cold fingers on the back of his cheek. "Your fever is fairly low, Odin, but that's hardly at the top of my list of concerns. Are you aware what happened to you back there?"

 _Yes,_ he tries to say, but his voice is nothing at all. No squeak, no muted noise, just empty words. He closes his mouth, coughs to clear his throat, but his second attempt at talking is no more successful than the first. The burning in his throat, he realizes, isn't a burn at all. It's a lingering bite of magic.

His eyes are no longer betraying him, at least, because he sees the gentle glance Niles passes to Leo. He bites his lower lip, and then Odin bites his own tongue.

“You can’t speak, Odin?” Leo asks just to confirm. Odin nods his head solemnly. He can’t speak. Leo reaches out and drags his thumb over the apple of Odin’s throat. “I wish I were able to say I’m surprised.”

Niles hums and Odin finds his eyes flicking between them. "You think that mark on his neck took his voice?"

"It won't stop with his voice," Leo confirms. Odin opens his mouth to ask what mark, but he can't speak and he doesn't have to. Niles pulls an ornamental hand mirror from the bedside table and Odin looks through it to where Leo just brushed his skin. There, curled up around the apple of his throat, is an inky black marking. Just a tiny crow or dragon-like image, and its head is pointed downwards and settled in the nest his throat makes with his collarbones. It's the mark of his spirit pact, and Odin doesn't like it. Just looking at it makes his dizziness come back, and he pushes his mirror back into Niles's hands.

"What is it, milord?" Niles asks. "I've never seen this sort of curse before."

"It isn't a curse so much as a contract," Leo answers. Odin can't talk, and so he doesn't, while Leo goes on to explain it to Niles. "Though any mage can do it, with enough dedication, dark mages especially are more capable of summoning spirits to create a spirit pact. The spirit will temporarily grant you incredible power, or give you anything you desire, but in exchange, it takes your life. This marking is nothing more than a corrupt timer. When the mouth of this serpent reaches Odin's heart, if not before then, he'll die."

Niles looks shocked to say the _very_ least. Leo just looks angry. "I see that you're not surprised, Odin. You did this on purpose, didn't you? What gives you the right to make such a deal with a devil? You swore your life to _me_ , but now you've given it to someone else."

Odin quickly looks down at his lap. Anywhere but Leo's eyes, because they're burning a hole in him. He shifts to sit up more, but a swift press against his shoulder has him laying back into the pillows, and Leo is scowling at him. "A mage with no voice is defenseless, Odin. You're weakened now, and without help, you'll only grow weaker."

"Is there a way to call off the bargain?" Niles asks. He settles his hand on Leo’s shoulder. Odin watches his fingers knead into his shirt there, and he notices just how tense Leo has become.

"That depends entirely on if the demon's half of the bargain has already been fulfilled.” Leo looks at Odin again, and Odin's' chest feels tight.

He made a bargain with a demon, yes. Based on the marking on his neck and the strength he was given, a mighty one at that. But his bargain was that Leo and Niles would be _safe_ , and if he were to go back on it now he couldn't promise that safety. So he shakes his head, quietly.

Odin doesn't have any family left to go home to. All he has now are his friends he's created in Nohr, and his life here was good. If he's meant to die at the hands of a curse he crafted with his own choices, then that's the way he'll die. He'll disappear into legend and be remembered by Leo and Niles and their children and grandchildren--and that's all he wants. But Leo's eyes flash with rage, and maybe unshed tears, and he stands up in a hurry. "Rest well, Odin. As soon as you're able to march, we're heading out to find a cure—any cure at all. You're not leaving us, not like this."

…

Odin is packing a bag. He’s not sure how long they’ll be gone, or what he needs to pack, but he isn’t a fool. If Leo is sending him on one last impossible journey, he’ll accept that fate with a hint of nostalgia. His voice is still gone. The mark on his neck hasn’t changed at all, but when he wakes up after a night's rest he feels like he hasn’t slept in days. he’s tired, his head is a fog, but he won’t disappoint his liege any more than he already has.

He turns when he hears his door opening. He finds Laslow and Selena standing there. He opens his mouth and questions what they’re doing here, but it’s useless. _What grand task brings you to the chambers of Odin Dark?_ But he only mouths half the sentence before his heart sinks and his expression falls. He tries to clear his throat, but it doesn’t help at all.

Laslow opens his mouth and closes it a few times. He looks like he really, really has something to say, but he doesn’t get to spit it out before Selena shouts. “What are you, an idiot? You’re _killing_ yourself. And for what? Just so you can look cool when you go? Your parents _died_ for you, Odin. _Gawds_ , you’re the worst.”

“Selena!” Laslow glares at her like he’s shocked. Odin isn’t. Selena has a sharp tongue, but she’s only worried about her friends. They don’t have much in this world outside of each other, and once Odin is eaten alive by a demon, she’ll have one person less. She folds her arms like she’s been scolded and pouts.

Odin waves his hand to dismiss it, but he doesn’t think they notice. So instead Laslow approaches with a bundled sword in his hands. Odin isn’t sure what it’s for, but as he unwraps the fabric Laslow has presented it in he can see that a name has been carved into it.

For a moment, he thinks back to when he was a teenager and scolding Laslow for his poor craftsmanship as he carved the name of every girl who ever rejected him into a scrap of iron that was once a sword. It makes him smile, but this sword is stronger than that. It’s shining and new, the blade is sharpened and polished. The engraving is precise. It reads _Moonbow._ The engraving is perfect, the script is elegant but powerful. This is the work of a steady hand. Just the sight of it puts a chill through Odin, and he looks up at Laslow looking for some explanation.

“Well, you see, Niles reported to King Xander that your voice was lost, but that he and Prince Leo would be accompanying you on a mission to redeem it.” Among other things. Namely his life. “Selena and I couldn’t let you go unarmed, of course, so we worked together to get you a weapon we knew you would be proud to use. I’ve been told by the wisest man I know that a weapon is meaningless without an awe-inspiring name. We went ahead and took care of that for you as well. Will it do?”

Odin sets the sword on the bed. He’s already inspected it. It’s a light sword, the blade is just right for precise, painful cuts. Not a breath after he sets it down he flings his arms around Laslow and Selena, bringing them together in an incredibly uncomfortable group hug that has Laslow laughing (and sniffling) and Selena pretending to gag. It will certainly do.

…

“Odin,” Leo says, while he finishes tucking away some last-minute additions to the saddlebag on his horse. “Are you all ready? I see you have a weapon more suited to silence. Have you brought anything else you may need?”

Odin knows what he means. Has he taken care of all he needs to take care of, has he got his affairs in order, because he may not be coming back from this journey alive. He nods his head, yes, but he doesn't know if it's true. He hasn't said proper goodbyes. Will he ever see Lady Elise again, giggling and waving? Or the baby prince Siegbert, babbling away? He would like to hope he will.

Niles comes up behind him and pats him on the back, but the impact leaves his shoulder feeling sore. It shouldn’t, Odin knows. He feels drowsy and tired, but he must keep up appearances for his liege so that they can keep higher spirits. After all, this will either save his life or be the end of it, but there’s no reason to let Niles and Leo suffer.

“Oh,” Niles says, and not a breath after he says it Odin realizes just what it is he’s ‘oh-ing’ about. An unusual dampness slips down his upper lip, and he reaches up to catch it in his hand. Blood, he realizes when he pulls his hand back to inspect it. He tilts his head back to catch it and Niles scoffs at him and pushes his head forward instead. “You’ll get blood in your throat,” is his only explanation.

Sure, but it’s far less messy. It doesn’t particularly matter. While he babies him, Niles draws the tips of his fingers along Odin’s cheek, and then up to the bridge of his nose. It has heat rushing to his face and blush spreading down his cheeks and neck, but that gentle caress is only the familiar tingle of Niles’s healing magic, nothing more.

In a matter of seconds, the bleeding is stopped, and Odin looks back up at Leo just in time to see him frowning deeper. He climbs onto his mount without another thought, and once he’s settled he looks at Niles. “Bring extra healing staves and potions. It’s already begun.”

Odin’s heart sinks into his stomach, or maybe it’s his lungs because he feels breathless. He reaches up to rub his nose where it’s itchy and flaky from the drying blood. It’s hard to properly believe it… but he’s dying.


	2. My Destiny Is In Your Hands

_ I know my destiny is in your hands.  _

_ I don’t expect it to come easy, I know I’ll get what I deserve. _

 

The air is frigid and it’s too dark to make out the shape beside him at first. Odin wakes with a startle but he recognizes Niles’s voice anywhere. He’s gently shaking Odin’s arm and whispering to him. “Come on. Follow me,” he says. Odin groans but it dies in his throat. He’s beginning to think that being exhausted is a permanent fixture in his life, now. His bones creak while he sits up and then he pushes himself out of the tent flap and after Niles. 

 

Not having a voice wasn’t so bad at the castle. He knew he could readily find anything he needed. Now it’s dark and he’s uncertain of where they’re going, and Odin wishes he had some way of calling out to Niles.  _ Where are we going? _

 

The woods surrounding them are dense and murky. It’s like the color is bleeding out of them the further they get from their tents. An owl shrieks not far from him, and bugs are buzzing wildly from the cold. The thick fog clings to his skin like water droplets and Odin pulls his arms close and tucks his hands against his sides. 

 

The grass crunches under their feet. Niles keeps his pace only a few steps ahead of Odin, walking with a purpose in mind while Odin, alternatively, wanders. He glances around and tries to remember where they came from. It doesn’t feel like they’ve twisted and winded, but there’s no sign of their campfire behind them. Everything is gone. 

 

He’s about to catch up with Niles when he finds himself stopping in his tracks. Niles glances at him over his shoulder, his eye glinting in the moonlight. “What is it? Keep moving. Lord Leo is just up ahead,” He says, then he crosses over a rope bridge in nothing short of shambles. 

 

Odin doesn’t do bridges. It’s not by anyone’s fault but his own, but they scare him. The height of it, the drop, knowing that no matter what he tries to grab for there will be nothing to save him. Of course in his life he’s had to cross them anyway. Sturdy bridges. Battered up rope bridges with rotting out planks are completely different. He looks up and Niles’s name catches in his throat. 

 

He doesn’t want to do this. Niles doesn’t stay, though. He stops moving at the other end of the gorge and he folds his arms over his chest. “Any day now, Odin,” He calls. 

 

He’s going to die one way or another. Be it demon or falling to his death… Odin supposes he needs to just accept this fate. He sucks in a breath through his nose and sighs it out in a stream through his chapped lips. The ropes supporting the bridge are frayed. He curls his hands around them and slides his palms along them while he takes his first few steps. The planks hold up beneath him and that puts him at least slightly at ease. 

 

His fingertip catches a snag in the rope and he hesitates in his steps to look at it. It looks like a simple fray, but the more he stares the more the rope unravels, until it snaps and the entire bridge lurches sideways. Odin tries to scream, but it comes out silent and empty. He clings to the other side, but his legs are dangling in the air. He looks back up and Niles doesn’t seem to be anywhere at all. The remains of the rope snaps and the air leaves Odin’s lungs all at once while he plummets. He clings to the rope but he hits the side of the cliff. He’s dizzy. If he could find the strength, he could climb up the boards like a ladder, he could get up to safety. Instead his head is a bowl of water sloshing around, and he can’t feel his arms. 

 

“Odin!” Niles shouts. It snaps Odin out of the haze and he looks up. Niles is there, leaning over the side of the gorge and reaching out his hand. How? How can he be on this side of the gorge--Odin just saw him cross. He looks over his shoulder again. There he is, standing at the other side. A wide grin spreads over his face, wicked while he licks his lips.  _ “Odin!”  _ Niles shouts again.

 

There’s no time to waste. He throws his weight into reaching for Niles’s hand and he barely clasps their wrists together before the bridge collapses entirely and Niles is jerking Odin up so hard that they fall back onto the rocks. It skins up Odin’s knees through his sleeping pants and Niles sits back on his ass to catch his breath. “What are you doing out here, Odin?” He says between lungfuls of air. 

 

“Odin! What’s your problem? Are you coming or not?” Niles shouts from across the gorge. Odin turns his head and looks at him. He’s got this unnatural grin on his face. Niles’s smiles are always charming in a way, even when he’s at his most sadistic. This isn’t charming at all, but a grin that literally splits his face with shark-like teeth. Odin’s heart stutters. He feels a tight grip on his arms and his whole body flinches in response. 

 

Niles, the Niles who saved him, he pulls Odin a little closer and turns his head to get his attention. “What are you looking at? There’s nothing over there. Whatever you see isn’t there. It’s not real. I’m real--I’m real.” 

 

“Won’t you join me?” Fake Niles asks from across the way. Odin squeezes his eyes shut. This is a dream, maybe. He’ll wake up. But he doesn’t wake up, just grows fond of the way Niles is holding his jaw with his thumb and index finger. 

 

“You’re shaking,” Niles mumbles. He pulls on Odin until he’s standing on his feet, but Odin has never felt less like he could walk. He nearly died on that bridge, and more than that he nearly died chasing after an imposter. But he seemed so real. The way his hand felt on his shoulder to wake him, the way he smelled just slightly of mint leaves. It was so perfectly Niles. 

 

Almost as perfect as this Niles, who slips an arm around Odin’s shoulders to steady him on the way back to the camp. The woods don’t look quite so murky anymore. It’s still foggy and cold, but he can see more vibrant colors again and he recognizes some of the landmarks. His shakes only get worse, so bad that his teeth start chattering. It’s only then that Niles stops. He unclicks the clasp of his cape and in less than a heartbeat he swings it around Odin’s shoulders. Then he pulls the hood up over his head, drags Odin close to him, and rubs his hands up and down his back and shoulders to create some friction. 

 

Odin closes his eyes. This is a small taste of heaven, he thinks. Niles’s chest is so firm and warm. He can hear his heart thumping slowly, and he’s just so  _ warm _ . There is just one thing out of place that keeps Odin from thinking it’s perfect. He pulls his face away just slightly and catches a glimpse of a chain Niles is wearing around his neck. Thin, beaded, it’s nothing special or expensive, but it is only a vessel for the ring that’s strung around it. It’s identical to the ring on his hand, Odin is sure, but he’s wearing it at his neck. 

 

It takes him a few seconds to decide it must be because Leo hasn’t announced his engagement yet. He can’t risk being seen wearing his own wedding ring, and so Niles is keeping it safe. There’s a special sort of beauty in that, a promise that Niles will protect him as he always does.

 

_ Please let me live long enough to see their wedding. _

 

A short bit of time passes and then Niles pushes Odin back out of this embrace. “Much as I fancy standing here hugging all day, we should get you back to the fire. Milord will be anxious to know you’re safe.” 

 

Odin nods his head. He tucks his arms into Niles’s cape and keeps it drawn tightly closed around himself. He’s absolutely freezing! The walk back to camp feels longer than the walk away from it did. Maybe there were some twists and turns he doesn’t recall, or maybe it was all the work of that imposter Niles. Regardless, they find the fire just fine and Odin plops onto the ground in front of it. 

 

Not long after he finds himself settled by the fire he hears footsteps behind him. A quick glance over his shoulder tells him that it’s Leo, and he comes out to sit down beside him. He has a book in his hand, an empty journal, and a quill. He puts it into Odin’s hands. “Tell me what happened,” He says. 

 

Odin looks down at the tools in his hands. Yes… this seems like it should be an easy way to communicate, but it also feels empty and hollow. He doesn’t take the time to write the way he would talk himself, and it’s a little unsettling. He wants his voice back.  _ I woke to Niles asking me to follow him. He led me out into the woods and to a bridge where I nearly fell. Then the real Niles rescued me, but I could still hear the other one. _

 

He misses his voice but he does find some sense of calm in the sound of a quill scratching against paper. He passes the whole journal to Leo, who balances it over his knees while he reads it. His lips draw into a fine line. Will he ever smile again? Odin doesn’t regret saving them, but he misses the moments when Leo seemed calm. 

 

“I don’t know all there is to know about spirit pacts,” Leo mumbles. He taps his thumb anxiously against the corner of the journal. “I do know based on rumor alone, hallucinations aren’t uncommon. I fear this may become a regular occurance. Know this: from now on Niles or myself will never lead you anywhere in the dark. We will only travel by daylight.” 

 

“Speaking of,” Niles cuts in. Odin didn’t realize he was listening, but he looks over his shoulder and there he is. He has a bag on his arm, one that Odin knows has their food supplies. “It’s almost daylight now. Maybe I ought to make us breakfast.” 

 

“I appreciate it, Niles,” Leo says. He’s still got that frown buried deep into his features. Odin looks at the fire, unwilling to look at it. There’s not silence, not really. Niles has an iron pan that he’s working on heating some food with. Odin doesn’t know why today they have the luxury of warm food on the road but he’s thankful. He’s  _ exhausted _ . 

 

Was he dreaming, before? Sleep walking? He doesn’t know how hallucinations really work, all he knows is that he feels once more like he hasn’t slept at all and that he can barely lift his head. He wraps his arms around his knees and lays his cheek on top of them. He only barely registers when Leo drapes a blanket over his shoulders. He should protest--his liege surely needs it more--but he doesn’t. He just wonders if he could nap like this. The only problem is that when he closes his eyes it’s like speckles of white and black flash behind his eyelids. He can’t sleep if he begs. 

 

“The man who attacked us at the ball the other night,” Leo begins out of seemingly nowhere. Niles and Odin both glance at him, albiet Odin with far less energy. He didn’t ever see the man. All he saw were the effects of his magic. Dark magicks, spells that Odin can’t even comprehend. “Did we receive a report on where he went?” 

 

_ ‘He’s alive?! _ ’ Odin tries to speak, but it just comes out silent as always. Leo pushes the book towards Odin. 

 

“Use this if you must, it’s yours,” He says. 

 

“He asked if he’s alive,” Niles answers. Odin is only bewildered for a moment, before Niles taps the corner of his mouth. “Every once in a while I can read your lips. When you don’t use all those frilly words. But the book will be easier for us to know for certain.” 

 

Oh. He can read lips. That makes sense, Niles goes on a lot of stealthy missions. Odin looks down at the fire again. Leo clears his throat. 

 

“Well the answer to your question then is yes. He’s alive, he retreated. I was hoping we might find out where. There’s no telling what kind of power he has.” 

 

“There was a witness,” Niles says. He sets down a plate of food in front of Odin, and passes one to Leo. Odin wants to eat it. He’s so hungry, he’s so cold, but the moment he looks at it his stomach twists up and his throat closes up. Maybe if he gives it a few minutes he can eat. “They said they thought they knew of him, that he has had a vendetta against the royal family for years. No one knows where he went, only that we anticipate another attack.” 

 

“Yes, well, next time we won’t be so lucky,” Leo says. Lucky that Odin saved them, at is. No man has that kind of power naturally, after all, and Odin will be dead soon. That’s what he means. There’s no reason to be silent about it. But instead of saying it, he reaches out and tilts Odin’s chin up with his thumb and finger.

 

“There’s no visible change to your spirit marking,” he says. Odin doesn’t know what that means. “Hmm. These are said to kill incredibly swiftly. Odin, is it possible that the demon’s end of the bargain  _ hasn’t _ been completed, yet?” 

 

Well. Odin doesn't know. He doesn’t know anything about how this demon pact works, only that his father told him over and over again never to do it if he ever learned magic. And he did, he learned a little magic from him, and then dark magic when he came to Nohr. But if he puts his heart and soul into thinking about it… he supposes he wanted to make sure Leo and Niles were safe and lived a happy life. And if the man trying to kill them is still out there and alive… maybe that means the demon  _ hasn’t _ finished his work.

 

He can see a light in Leo’s eyes as he nods his head. Yes, it’s  _ possible _ , and Leo sighs in relief. “If it hasn’t held up it’s end of the bargain maybe it  _ can’t _ kill you, yet. Odin, this could save your life.” 

 

“Milord,” Niles says, “Who are we to assume a demon will keep up a deal?” 

 

“We can’t make assumptions,” Leo admits. “But we can hope. The entire value of a spirit pact is that they are always honored, and--oh.” Leo reaches into his pocket and pulls a handkerchief out of it. He gently reaches out and uses it to brush at Odin’s nose. When he pulls it away it’s stained red, and he sighs. “Perhaps you can’t die, but it can certainly make you suffer in the meantime.” 

 

The path they take when they’ve finished eating and packed up their tents is a familiar one. Odin finds that he’s being led by Leo and Niles down the very same way the fake Niles led him this morning. And then, when they reach the collapsed bridge, Leo makes a noise caught between a whine and a growl. 

 

“This is the bridge where Odin fell,” Niles says softly. 

 

Leo nods his head. “Yes, and the only way to cross the gorge. To go around will add three days on to our trip.” He looks back at Odin. He’s got that look on his face again. Twisted up, his lips thin. Odin is starting to understand that it’s  _ fear _ . “There’s no sense in standing around. We need to continue.” 

 

They head east from there. They walk not far from the gorge, so they’ll know exactly when they can get around it… but a safe enough distance no one is at risk of falling. Niles stays close by Leo’s horse and Odin trails along behind them. He doesn’t mean to keep falling behind, it’s just his feet feel like they’re bruising with every step. 

 

“Where exactly are we going, milord?” Niles asks. He taps gently on Leo’s thigh, where he sits atop his steed, and Leo looks at him helplessly. Then he sighs and reaches his hand down to curl his fingers up in Niles’s hand. Odin knows that Leo is worried and stressed… and so he’s glad Niles is here to soothe him, because all Odin is capable of doing is adding to the stress.

 

Before he was jealous. He longed for Leo and Niles to love each other just a little less freely in front of him, because it broke his heart knowing he couldn’t have them. But now… Now he’s going to die. He’s never going to love anyone at all--and that’s alright. It’s alright so long as they can love each other. He made this sacrifice for this love of theirs. He wants them to nurture it. 

 

“There’s a fort not far from here. The only confirmed case of a spirit pact I’m aware of happened to a previous Nohrian king. Our grandfather, actually, the king that Siegbert is named for. He didn’t create the pact himself, that is, but he had a retainer who did to protect him.” 

 

Leo stops talking for a moment. He sees Niles squeeze his hand tighter. Odin looks at the ground. It’s not that he wanted to die. He’s not unaware of Leo’s feelings. When Odin swore his life to Leo he didn’t swear to die, he swore to live and protect him. By creating this pact to save him he  _ is _ going to die, and Leo never wanted that. He’s probably harboring guilt about it. 

 

Odin decides in that moment that he needs to write them both letters. He needs to tell them why he did this, he needs to admit his feelings, but he also needs to let them know that he wants them to find peace in his death. He wants to die knowing they’re happy. 

 

Leo clears his throat. “Anyway… The king was staying in this particular fort when it happened. He studied spirit pacts endlessly to try and save his retainer, and it is the only fort in Nohr with any literature on how they work.” 

 

“Did he?” 

 

Leo falters. “Did he what, Niles?” 

 

“Save his retainer.” 

 

There’s a beat of silence. Leo looks back at the road in front of them. “No. He died.” 

 

Leo and Niles chatter to each other softly. Odin continues to trail behind them. He doesn’t get far. Now and then they notice him lagging and slow down until he catches up. Odin doesn’t mind, but he hates to be a burden. Several hours pass by when he begins to get the distinct feeling that they’re being watched. It’s like eyes are burning into the back of his head. It makes goosebumps on his arms and the hair at his neck stands on end.

 

He stops walking, and instead turns to look to his left. There, standing a few yards away, there’s a little boy. His clothes are tattered and singed at the edges, and so is his hair. It’s blonde and short, matted to his head with dirt and sweat. His skin is filthy, he’s greasy, and so very skinny. When the breeze comes it’s like he sways in it, wavering on his feet. 

 

He locks eyes with Odin, but he doesn’t move. He doesn’t blink. He doesn’t speak. He just stares at him, with an eerily calm smile on his face. 

 

“Odin?” Leo calls back over his shoulder. “Is something wrong?” 

 

Odin can’t even look at him. He can’t take his eyes off of this boy’s. They’re bright, but it’s like they’re colorless. Striking but such an uneasy contrast to his physical state. He doesn’t stop smiling at Odin. He doesn’t take a single step, doesn’t say a single word… and then his head tilts slightly to the side. Odin opens his mouth like he might talk, but then the boys’ head tilts too far. All the way around, like an owl, and it has Odin gasping and stumbling back a few steps. 

 

He starts to walk closer. He holds out one hand like he’s reaching for Odin, and he stumbles in his direction like he’s undead. Odin keeps trying to back up, but he bumps into something solid. Niles. Niles catches him around his shoulders like he’s trapping him, holding him in place. Is this the real Niles, or that hallucination again? Is any of this a real threat to Leo, or is it a figment of Odin’s imagination? He gasps when Niles grips his shoulders, but his hold is gentle. He looks back at the boy only to see that he’s gone… and Niles turns him around to look him in the eye. “Odin,” Niles says, “There’s nothing--It’s nothing.” He reaches out with his cape and wipes Odin’s face. He clicks his tongue. “I need to get my staff. You’re bleeding pretty bad this time.” 

 

The dribble of blood from his nose leaks all the way down to his chin, but Odin hadn’t even noticed it. He was too busy staring at that boy. He shudders, but jogs to keep up with Niles. 

 

He doesn’t want to be alone.

 

…

 

There isn’t much daylight left above the dense trees. “We should find a place to make camp,” Leo says. Odin thinks that’s a great idea, because he doesn’t feel like he can take another step without a nap. But then Leo gasps. “Odin, look out!” He calls. Odin looks over his shoulder behind him just in time to see a small handful of faceless monsters emerge from the woods. They’re not the scariest thing he’s seen all day, but they’re certainly the most real threat.

 

Of course he can’t show weakness now. He pulls his sword from his hip and drops his weight into a familiar stance. His center of gravity is low and he lunges out to attack one of the monsters closing in around him. He hears the whizz of Niles’s arrows past his ears, and he can smell Leo charging his spell. 

 

It’s been a long time since he’s fought with a sword. Training swords for fun, with Laslow, but this is different. This is survival, and he’s already weak. Thankfully the first two are defeated easily. Leo and Niles make quick work of one and Odin cuts down the other. Maybe that boosts his confidence too high, because the next thing he knows his shoulder is on fire and he can’t  _ breathe. _

 

He falls face first onto the ground, but he hears Niles’s shout and Leo cast a spell to finish off the last monster. When the magic in the air settles Niles crouches by Odin’s side and pulls him up against his chest. Not to hold him, but to get a grip under his shirt and pull it up over his arms. It burns when it slides off, and it sticks to his torn skin.

 

“Is it bad?” Leo asks. He slides off of his horse and comes closer to look at Odin’s shoulder. He was whipped with a chain, the shards of memories connected to that pain are telling him that. His shoulder is battered, but Niles is already using a stave to mend it. Normally the relief from healing spells comes quickly. It stings for a second and then the pain melts away. This time there’s still a dull throbbing in his arm, and Niles makes a noise of discontent.

 

“I can’t get the bruise.” 

 

Leo trails his fingertips over Odin’s shoulder. He can’t see it, but he supposes there’s a welt of a bruise there that Niles isn’t able to heal. Leo sighs through his nose. “Odin’s body is failing him,” He says. He walks around and crouches in front of Odin and pulls the gauntlets off his hands so he won’t hurt him while he inspects his neck again for any sign that this demon is trying to kill him. 

 

Odin has a headache. His eyes burn with his exhaustion, his body feels limp, and his chest hurts while he watches Leo and Niles worry over him. Through all of that, though, he feels the cool touch of Leo’s engagement ring tucked against his neck. It makes his eyes open a little wider.

 

What?

 

He sits back from Leo and turns. Niles is still behind him, and he nearly falls into his lap. “Woah! Calm down, there, I might think you’re being forward with-- _ Odin!”  _ His lewd comment tapers off because Odin reaches behind him and tugs gently on the chain on Niles’s neck. If Niles is wearing a ring  _ and _ Leo is wearing a ring, he’s very curious what this chain is all about. 

 

Niles looks down at the ring Odin is fiddling with there at his neck, and then Odin watches him look hesitantly at Leo. Leo, in turn, shrugs. He settles so he’s sitting beside them there in the dirt more comfortably, and Odin settles on the ground between them. “I suppose now is as good a time as any. Best to bring it up sooner rather than later.” 

 

Niles lifts the chain over his head and Leo reaches out to take it from him. He’s working at the clasp when he says “Odin… I overheard you mention that you missed home, and I remembered a conversation that we had long ago. You told me that when this was all over you may leave me, but no matter where you went you would always maintain your title as my retainer. Do you remember that?”

 

Yes. Odin nods his head. It makes him dizzy, but he absolutely refuses to let this conversation melt into a fuzzy blur. “I thought perhaps you would decide to go home, and I recall you said you would never return if you did. That’s why… well it’s why we were afraid to ask you to marry us. We wanted to wait until you had made your decision, without our influence.” 

 

Odin’s brain checks out. His eyes glaze over and he repeats those words over and over and over again.  _ Marry us. _

 

Niles leans closer, hooks his chin over Odin’s good shoulder. Very slowly, almost like a dream, he brings his arm up to wrap around his chest in a gentle hug, and suddenly he’s not tired or cold anymore. He looks at Leo and he’s taken the ring from the chain entirely. He has it in one hand, but his other hand he uses to scoop up Odin’s and hold it gently. 

 

“I never wanted to lose you, of course, but I wouldn’t stop you from returning home, Odin,” Leo says. He looks almost ashamed of himself. “I was afraid to tell you sooner and sway your decision, but now... “ 

 

He squeezes Odin’s hand. “I won’t lose you like this. I’ll sleep well at night knowing that you’re safe and sound at home, but I can’t live with myself if I let you die.” 

 

He’s dizzy. Actually dizzy, and breathless, and then Odin’s chest clenches. His heart stutters. This is a hallucination. It has to be. It’s all too good to be true, and before he knows it Leo’s hands are holding his face and his thumb is brushing under his wet eyelashes. Niles hums near his ear and lays his cheek against Odin’s head. 

 

What if it was real? What if they’ve been in love with him just as long as he’s loved them. What if all those times they’ve touched his shoulder, they’ve smiled at him, their gazes have lingered were more? 

 

“Hush, now, Odin. We don’t have to act on this, don’t cry. You will always be my best friend above all else.” 

 

_ ‘But!’  _ Odin tries to protest. There’s nothing of course, but the movement of his lips.

 

Niles chuckles beside him. Leo  _ smiles _ . Just weakly, without much energy. He turns Odin’s hand over and places the ring in it, gently. “This is yours, Odin. Whether you wear it or not. My promise to you is that I will do everything in my power to keep you by my side.” 

 

Odin hesitates for a moment. He looks  at the ring. It’s just the same as theirs. A perfect match. “If you want it, it’s yours,” Niles mutters from behind him. He shifts back so Odin can move more freely, but Odin hates that. He wishes he would stay there, because he was keeping away the chill. “Just because you’re an idiot and trying to get yourself killed doesn’t mean we love you any less. It may actually be why I love you.” That last bit is just softer than the rest, and Odin feels a silent laugh bubble up his throat. It still feels like a normal laugh, sound or not. 

 

He slips the ring on his finger. Leo sighs like he’s relieved. Niles gently hugs Odin around his waist once again, like he’s read his mind and come to give him the attention he’s been starved for all this time. Leo brings Odin’s hand up to kiss his knuckles. 

 

“Now, more than ever, I want to keep you safe. I want to call you my husband, Odin. I want to hear your vows.” 

 

Odin is still dizzy. Tired. But there’s something about them that makes him think this is real. This must be real. He’s not on edge and not afraid. He just wants to stay here, in this handful of seconds, for the rest of his life.


	3. Reckon With Your Flaws

_ The only question that I have now is do you think that I’ve been childish? _

_ Or is it part of growing wiser to reckon with your flaws. _

 

Their fire is burning a little too low for Odin’s standards. It’s like he’s always getting colder with every second that passes. He’s a little worried he’ll never be warm again. So he’s just adding a log to the fire when he feels overwhelming heat tickling the back of his hand. 

 

At first, he thinks the flame may have licked past his skin, and so he rips his hand back away from the fire so he doesn’t burn himself. The only problem is that his hand continues to burn without any regard to his feelings, and then his palm is a fire all its own. 

 

Terror spreads over him. He wants to put out this fire, but he can’t seem to smother it. He thinks he can hear his skin simmering. He yelps fruitlessly and chokes back a sob of pain while he tries to use his shirt to suffocate the flames crackling along his skin. He collapses onto his back and knocks over a tin kettle in the process. There’s no water in it, no salvation. Not very many seconds pass before Leo is falling to his knees at his side. He leans over him and holds his shoulders, and he gently tries to steady Odin. “What’s wrong?” He asks, gently.

 

What’s wrong? How can Leo even ask? His hand is on fire! He’s  _ burning _ , it  _ hurts! _ But while he’s flailing his hand around Leo just takes it in his own hands gently. He acts like he can’t even see or feel the flame. Maybe he can’t. Odin’s chest gets tight. He forgets to take a breath, his heart skips a few beats. He’s hallucinating again, isn’t he?

 

Maybe he's going insane. He'll be one of the poor, ruined people who wander the streets shouting at the air because he isn't only hallucinating, but he completely believes everything he sees. This pain, this burning in his hand, the smell of singed flesh in his nose… it isn’t real. 

 

“Niles? Niles, come bring a heal staff for Odin,” Leo calls over his shoulder urgently, “Something seems to be hurting him.” When he’s through saying it Leo puts both of his hands through Odin’s hair. He combs through the short ends and rubs his fingertips along his scalp. It’s soothing, but not soothing enough to keep Odin calm. The burning sensation in his hand dies, but when he glances down at his hand he doesn’t see what he expects. He  _ expects _ to see burnt flesh, raw and melted. Instead, he sees his hand in pristine condition, but a familiar brand burned into it. He sees six glowering eyes twisted together with thorns, each one of them blinking like they’re alive. It’s the mark of the Fell Dragon, Grima, just as it always looked when it was there on his father’s hand. That was before his curse was lifted. 

 

For a moment he just stares at it. The idea that Grima is alive in this world is more terrifying than any demon trying to kill him. The idea that the demon he sold himself to could somehow  _ be  _ Grima is even more terrifying. They killed him. Odin saw that dragon fall and he knows the sacrifices his father made to see to it. People used to speculate, of course. Odin’s father carried the blood of that monstrous dragon, and so too do his children. Could it be so easy for the evil that swept through and killed everyone he loved to come back and do it again? Will he be the cause? 

 

It isn’t possible. This is fake, this has to be a nightmare. This isn’t real. Odin takes a shaky breath and tries to will the image to disappear from his hand. It doesn’t work, but the next thing he knows Leo is pulling his fingers away from his head. He whispers, “Odin, your hair…” Odin can’t see it, but he’s willing to bet now that it’s turned lighter. His natural color. Like his father’s. 

 

Niles rushes to them with the heal staff in his hands, but he sways to a gentle stop in front of them. He looks at Odin like he’s uncertain that it’s even him until he says "Tell me what hurts." 

 

Odin looks at the brand on his hand again, and then he holds it out to show Niles. Niles is slow in his reaction. His frown grows tight. His brows knit together. Finally, he takes Odin’s hand in his, and he kisses the back of it, square in the center of the brand. Then he says “I’m sorry, luv. There’s nothing here.” 

 

When Odin takes his hand back from Niles he’s right. There’s nothing on his hand where that brand just was. Leo swipes his hand gently along the back of Odin’s head. “Blonde again,” he hums softly about his hair. 

 

Niles gently pushes magic into Odin’s hand to try and soothe it, but the pain is only just an echo of a memory now anyway.

 

…

 

Odin chokes, and when he does he takes in a lungful of water. He jolts into awareness only to find himself in the shallows of a lake so chilled that the top has bits of ice floating along it. He’s not sure how he got here, and his brain struggles to process that he even  _ is _ here. It lags, it feels like his thoughts slow down to a snail’s pace while he floats there, broken. It’s  _ freezing. _ He’s in a lake. He can’t breathe. It’s like the water is constricting his chest—he struggles to suck in another gasp of air, and it feels too thin. He needs to get out of this water! 

 

His brain loses track of his body while he tries to swim to shore. It’s not a very long swim, but he flails helplessly once or twice in his efforts to get to safety. It’s too cold to swim. Too cold to think. His chest burns from swallowing the murky water. His eyes sting.

 

How did he get here?

 

When he’s on the muddy shore he pushes his weight onto his hands and tries to stand. He slips off a rock and slices his palm open on the first try. He hisses in some pain, but it’s not half as painful as staying in this water will be. Niles can heal that. His second try he makes it shakily to his feet, and that’s when he thinks he might just collapse. He turns in a slow circle, trying to get a read on where he came from. Just a hint would be nice, but thankfully he can see the smoke spiraling up from their campfire not far away. He didn’t wander far. His teeth are chattering, his limbs are shaking uncontrollably, and he feels heavy and weighed down by the sopping wet clothes he’s wearing. He needs to get back to Niles and Leo. They’re not far. He’ll make it. Just so long as he’s not imagining that smoke, too. 

 

The walk back to them is agony. He’s been sleepwalking again, so he’s not wearing any shoes. There are twigs and rocks that snap and shift under his feet while he walks. The wind picks up and whips around him like it’s going through his skin and pushing out any of the remaining heat. He nearly falls over for how cold it is, and how weak he is. He’s never been this weak before. He can feel his body giving up all around him. 

 

By the grace of the gods or the angels or whatever might be looking out for him, Leo and Niles meet him not far from the camp. All at once they rush to his side, press themselves close, and shield him from the wind. Niles is already peeling off Odin’s clothes before he even talks. He drops the soggy shirt to the ground. “Where were you?” 

 

“You fell into a lake?” Leo makes an educated guess and he’s not entirely wrong. Odin doesn’t know how he got into that lake, but he nods his head. Then Leo puts his fingers against Odin’s face. He’s sure that Leo’s fingers are subjectively cold, but they feel so nice against his skin anyway. Niles literally jerks Odin’s pants and everything that may or may not be beneath with them. It leaves him completely nude, but Odin doesn’t have time to be modest. He’s too distracted by his liege, how beautiful he looks despite the situation. He’s disheveled by the unexpected night-time adventure, glowing pale in the moonlight, and touching Odin like he’s fragile. Leo pushes Odin’s wet bangs out of his face and sighs while Niles mysteriously sprints away from them. Then again, it isn’t that complex of a mystery. He returns less than a minute later with new clothes for Odin. It’s just a set of loose fitting clothes that don’t particularly match. The fabric clings to Odin’s damp skin while he pulls it over his head. 

 

“Please, don’t get sick,” Leo whispers almost too softly to be heard. The chill still has Odin’s teeth chattering, but Leo helps Odin balance by steadying him beneath his elbows while he steps into the fresh pants Niles brought. Then he pulls him as close as they can be and tucks his chin over Odin’s head. It forces Odin to crouch--Leo is just slightly shorter than him in height—but it’s so  _ comfortable _ . Niles drapes a thick quilt around Odin’s shoulders, the finishing touch on his dutiful work to put him in dry, warm clothes, and then he just… lays against his back. He makes Odin into this weird, bent over sandwich between the two of them.

 

"Please stop sleepwalking," Niles mumbles as an argument. It’s nearly lost to the layers of fabric. “I’m never going to sleep again if you keep wandering off.” 

 

“He needs to sleep with us,” Leo breathes out his words like he’s realizing it. He pushes Odin back to an arm’s length, but then he quickly grabs for his hand and pulls him back to his and Niles’s tent. Odin doesn’t think he gets a say in the matter, but even if he did he would want to follow him. Leo forces him down into the middle of their bedding, pulls the blankets tight as he can around him, and then he settles down on the left side of him. He curls up on Odin’s chest like a cat who has slept with Odin his whole life. Niles settles down on his other side and produces one final blanket to flap over the three of them. 

 

“You can’t wander off if you’re trapped under us,” Leo mumbles. He tilts up his head and leaves the softest kiss against the corner of Odin’s jaw. It’s so gentle Odin wonders if it really happens. Niles gently drapes his knee over Odin’s legs, and he settles on him like he’s ready to go back to sleep. Odin is suddenly exhausted again, too. The dawn is still far off, and he’s warmer now than he’s ever been in his life.

 

Odin is dying, but if he dies cuddled up like this he may just die happy.

 

…

 

All she’s doing sitting with him. She’s not doing anything particularly incriminating, just picking at her cuticles and looking down at the half-written diary entry in her lap. Odin is seated next to her, but he’s not startled to see her. He’s not bothered by her. He hardly notices her. There’s a book he doesn’t recognize in his hands, it’s open to a page somewhere towards the middle. He’s got his legs curled up under himself comfortably, and he’s got a knit blanket that's draped halfway around his shoulders and halfway around hers. There are only a few inches of space between them. 

 

She’s just a child. Probably younger than he was when he jumped back through time with his cousin to try and save the world. A teenager just barely blossoming into the woman she’ll one day become. He has no idea who she is, that is, but they’re sharing a blanket and reading silently side by side, so they can’t be strangers. 

 

He’s glad that this feels like a dream, and not like he’s actually having an out of body experience while his real body wanders into another death trap. She’s got her hair braided down one shoulder, but pieces are sticking out. It's casual, like she slept on it the night before but just hasn’t restyled it. Her hair is pale, sandy blonde. She looks like Leo. Well--that is--she looks like Elise, who looks like Leo. She looks like she would fit easily into that family, based on the way she’s dressed. And they’re clearly in the castle. This feels like it’s probably her quarters. 

 

He looks at the book he’s holding. The words are perfectly normal, not written in some language he can’t understand, but he can’t seem to read it. Maybe he’s not meant to. In fact, just as he's having that thought, she pushes her journal out of her lap and turns to face him. "I want to talk to you about something," she says. 

 

That she said that isn’t surprising, not really. This is a dream and she wants to have a conversation. What’s  _ actually _ surprising is the way she flails her hands around when she does it. At first, he thinks she's just trying to get his attention, but that's not right. He takes much more interest in her when she keeps  _ doing it _ . She’s moving her hands to communicate. Even though she’s saying the words, they’re coming right out of her mouth… she’s using sign language, too. 

 

_ Yes _ , he means to say. He can talk to her. Or, well, she can talk to him. He doesn’t get to even try to say it. She just sort of assumes she can carry on while he thinks about how interesting her hand movements are. “I was just thinking about what happened yesterday. You know, out in that courtyard.” 

 

Odin doesn’t know. He shakes his head and she rolls her eyes. Then she stops talking because she watches him trying to recreate the hand motions. She’s moving her hands so  _ fast _ , it’s hard to keep up… but he wants to understand. This seems important, the way her fingers bend the way her hands sweep past her face or arms. He wants to learn. What if he can never speak again? What if he needs to communicate like this? Granted, he’ll probably die before he can learn, but he still wants to try. 

 

She parts her lips and raises up her eyebrow like she truly thinks he’s crazy. “Uh, no, dummy. Like this.” She reaches for Odin’s hands and curls her fingers around his, pushing them into the shapes she wants him to make. Her skin is softer, newer. She doesn’t have calloused fingers from weapons. It must be nice. He hopes she has a very boring childhood with no need to learn to defend herself. She corrects his hand position and guides him to recreate the sign. 

 

He smiles at her, and she snorts. "Annnnyway, what I was talking about is… well, you know how I got caught up in that tree, spying on them?" She keeps moving her hands while she talks, but this time much, much slower. She's letting him keep up. Her words drag down to a slower pace, too, but she doesn't seem to mind. "It's just… W-well, I have a  _ really _ big crush on that boy, a-and I don’t want him to think I’m some kind of creep…” 

 

Odin tries to recreate everything she does. He thinks he’s picking up a little bit of it. He’s figured out the word “I” anyway. That’s for sure. And ‘you,’ that one is obvious. She sounds like she’s seeking his advice, but she stops again to look at his hands while he repeats her signs. “Dad? Are you sick or something? How did you forget this stuff?” 

 

Oh. Could he be her father? This is just a dream, after all, and it seems perfectly rational. She’s behaving very rationally, too. She’s just asking her father for advice on boys. That’s normal teenager behavior, isn’t it? Odin hesitates but nods his head.  _ I’m very sick _ . 

 

She shrugs her shoulders. “Okay, well knowing your signs is more important. You need to know this way more than I need a boyfriend. Don’t worry. I’ll help you.” 

 

…

 

When Odin wakes up he’s choking on a frigid gasp. His whole left side suddenly feels like an ice cube, and he’s so, so tired. He feels like he stayed up all night talking with that girl, but he didn’t. He’s still lying in the bedroll. Niles is still snuggled into his side, has his arms circled around Odin’s like he’s clinging to him. Leo, however, is sitting up, and he left a frozen wasteland in his wake. He presses his fingers against Odin’s head, but they feel like icicles. 

 

Leo’s lips draw into a concerned frown. “You’ve got a fever. I knew this would happen.” He shifts to tilt Odin’s chin up and inspect the spirit marking on his neck, but this time his frown gets even tighter. “It’s moved lower.” He shifts his fingers to draw gently down Odin’s neck and sternum. His fingers come to rest only slightly lower than before. An inch or two. That’s where the mark is sitting, now. 

 

Leo grounds him. He’s not to leave bed except to relieve himself or eat, or to sit by the fire if he gets too cold. After he gives Odin those instructions, he gets up and takes a small walk… but Niles continues to sleep cuddled up with Odin for another hour. The whole time he lays there he worries about Leo. He’s clearly upset that he was wrong. They were all wrong. This demon will kill him one way or another, and it doesn’t obey any rules. Eventually, Niles gets up and tracks him down. Odin can tell they don’t want to waste the day away, but as soon as he starts coughing Leo forbids it. No one is marching today. There’s no point in speeding Odin’s death along. 

 

Odin is seated near the fire that afternoon, with a pillow in case he wants to nap and a pile of blankets so thick one might think he was making a nest. Niles comes over, sets a pot over the flames, and he starts to work on putting ingredients in. He’s making something that smells like a very basic stew--and the meat he adds he surely just hunted down in the woods. Stew sounds warm and soothing, so he wouldn’t complain. But once the pot is situated and ready to leave alone for some time, Niles plops down into the pile of blankets Odin has accumulated and hums at him. “I liked it better on your finger.” 

 

Odin almost doesn’t know what he means. Then he looks down at his hands. He’s got his engagement ring caught between a few fingers. He’s been fiddling with it, nervously, while he’s been lost in thought. He’s not hallucinated once today. It seems… wrong. That said, out of all the crazy things he’s seen or imagined in the last couple of days, he’s so very glad that this ring is real. He slips it back onto his finger and smiles at Niles… who leans closer until their shoulders gently press together. 

 

“Care to share what’s on your mind?” He asks. Odin glances down at the book and quill Leo gave to him. He shifts to reach for them, but then what he writes isn’t about hallucinations. Just about how happy he is about the reality. 

 

_ I can’t believe I missed all the signs that you two loved me as well. I had no idea that you wanted someone like me. _

 

Niles lays his cheek on Odin’s shoulder, but it doesn’t much muffle his voice when he huffs. “I’m insulted. I think I have great taste in men.” Odin smiles and gently thwacks Niles’s thigh with the backs of his fingers. Niles chuckles. “If we were secretive, it’s because we were waiting for your decision. There was no sense starting something if you were going to leave us forever.”

 

The words settle on Odin heavily. He may still leave them forever. In fact, all signs point in that direction. Niles doesn’t let him dwell on it. “You still can, if you want to, of course. Leave. Once we save you. We’ll be alright if you leave us to run along and be happy. I’m just not keen on letting some demon take you.” 

 

Odin shakes his head, and he scribbles a new note.  _ I want to stay. I decided that a long time ago. I want to see you two happy, and I’m so thankful I can be part of it. I’ve dreamed of seeing you both smile in the mornings or kissing you under the starlight.  _

 

He stops writing for a moment. He can feel Niles’s smile growing against his shoulder. Odin sighs.  _ I wish I could tell you that I love you with my own mouth.  _

 

Niles slowly shifts off his shoulder then. He pulls the book from Odin and oh, so carefully flips it closed, but sets it back down in his lap. He wouldn't take something so precious away. Instead, he waits for Odin to meet his gaze. "Odin," he says, "I can read lips." 

 

Odin’s eyes widen, and they sting with tears that he’s not expecting. He does his best to blink them back. Yes, he supposes he can. It may not be his voice, but at least Odin can say it, and Niles will know. So he does. He pushes the words out of his mouth, off of his tongue, and they come out barren and silent but they still convey the message to Niles.  _ I love you.  _

 

So Niles leans forward and catches his lips in an upward motion. Odin hiccups. He’s crying—he can’t help it. Niles doesn’t bother him about it. He just kisses him the way Odin has always wanted to be kissed. Slowly, dreamily. Romantically. His touch is so soothing while he rubs his thumb gently past Odin’s damp eyelashes. Odin has wanted this for so  _ long _ , it’s a shame for that kiss to end.

 

But when Niles leans away from him, he looks startled. Odin’s heart clenches. Is something wrong? It must be. Niles looks at his hand and so Odin follows that glance. Niles’s thumb is red. Odin reaches up and swipes at the tears at his eyes. His fingertips come back stained with blood. 

 

Niles kisses Odin’s forehead, and then he leaves to find his healing spells. 

 

…

 

Odin is nestled happily between them that night. His belly is full, he’s not chilled anymore, and his fever is lower. He’s safe and happy, but he simply can’t sleep. There’s a lightning storm. The thunder keeps him awake, it always does, and it makes him jolt with every blast. The only difference is this time he’s not alone in his bed. Odin is startled by another clap of thunder. Leo sleepily curls his arm tighter around Odin’s waist. 

 

Odin just wants to sleep. 

 

He closes his eyes to try and force it, and when he opens them again he’s looking up at the clear sky. Stars, crisp air, and no sign of trees for ages. He’s lying on his back still, but where Leo just was instead that girl from his other dream is laying on his arm. She’s looking up at the stars thoughtfully, and she says “Dad, do you really think that fallen heroes are up there?” She’s lying down, but just like before she uses sign language while she talks. Odin nods his head. At first he’s not sure if she sees it, but she nods too. Odin isn’t sure when he would have told her that. Once, ages and ages ago, a dear friend of his thought the stars were lonely. He decided right then that he was certain all their loved ones and heroes were in the stars, watching over them. 

 

A belief he supposes he's passed down to his daughter because she sighs softly. She's still signing slowly, waiting for him to keep up. She only reaches out to correct him once. "Do you think you can wish on a star? Will your wishes come true?” 

 

_ You have to meet it halfway, _ he wants to say. His father told him that once. A wish is only as powerful as the man who makes it. 

 

“I know, I know,” She says as if she can read his thoughts. Then she’s silent. They watch the stars together, but she doesn’t speak up again for a few minutes. When she does, she doesn’t lift her hands and she doesn’t speak loudly. It’s just a whisper. “Everything we ever do is already done.” 

 

Odin shifts so he can get a better look at her. Her eyes are glazed over. She won’t make eye contact. She says, “You’re already dead. I’m already dead. This is just an echo.” 

 

Odin sits up, and so does she. She doesn’t apologize for what she said, but when he looks over his shoulder he can see that creepy boy from the woods. He’s staring at them. Perfectly still. Perfectly silent. Creepy smile. It’s all there.

 

The girl stands up and pulls Odin to his feet. Once there she shoves Odin towards him. He has absolutely  _ no _ desire to follow that child to his death, but she says “Trust him.” She’s signing again, while she speaks. It’s like she’s normal again, and that whisper before was someone else. “He can take you where you need to go.” 

 

Odin  _ doesn’t _ trust him. He doesn’t know anything about this boy, only that he’s scary. He has no reason to trust her, either, but he does, sort of. She’s only ever taught him, not hurt him. So he looks at the boy again and sighs. He takes the steps needed to close the gap between them. The little boy reaches out his hand and Odin hesitantly slides his hand into his. 

 

He still doesn’t talk. He’s still dirty. He’s just walking at Odin’s side, pulling him along gently by his hand through the woods that certainly weren’t there a minute ago. They walk for days. It feels like forever. They come to a stop in a clearing that appears to be the ruins of a village. All the houses are rubble and burned down to the ground. Some of them look like their supports have collapsed, but  _ all _ of them look black and ashy. The grass is a wasteland. It’s all mangled and brown. There are stray possessions here and there. A lost boot. A frayed doll. 

 

There in the middle of the village, there is one house that isn't burnt. It's completely pristine, with a fine roof and even a plant in the window. Odin wants to avoid it at all costs. It looks innocent, but it’s dripping with malice. It’s certainly a trap, and this doesn’t feel like a safe dream anymore. He wants to avoid it, but that’s exactly where this boy drags him. Where he doesn’t want to be.

 

He’s starting to wonder if trusting the more docile of the two figments of his imagination was a bad choice. They come to a slow stop in front of the house, but then very suddenly the boy lets go of Odin's hand. He rushes for the door and pushes against it, but the moment his hands meet the wood the entire building erupts into flame. 

 

That little boy is going to die at this rate. Odin makes a quick grab for his wrist and snags him back a few steps. He thinks he's saved him, but he must have forgotten an important detail: this is a nightmare. When the boy turns to face him, his eyes are on fire. His mouth has fire spewing from it. His skin is melting off his bones. Odin gags and falls back a step.

 

The boy is gone. 

 

His vision is blurry at first, but when Odin blinks it away he realizes that he’s by himself. He’s not in the ruined village anymore, but he’s also not safe with his loves. He’s standing in front of a small cave, but there’s smoke coming from inside the entrance. He doesn’t want to go in there. In fact, he’s decidedly not going to go in there when a voice from inside calls out to him.”Who’s there?”

 

Like a fool, he hesitates. The person who steps out of the cave looks ordinary enough. Nohrian, an adult, he looks male. Odin has never seen him before in his life, but he knows who he is. The moment he lays eyes on him Odin’s eyes sting like they’re being scooped out of their sockets. His chest constricts, he can’t breathe, but it’s like he’s on fire. Lightning buzzes in impatient wait at his fingertips. No, he doesn’t recognize this face, but he knows this is the man who tried to kill Leo and Niles. This is the man that Odin made a deal with a demon to defeat, and whose defeat is standing between Odin and his own death. 

 

It’s time for him to die.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't forget that you can read a chapter ahead if you support me on patreon! Chapter 4 is already published there for tiers $5 and up! Check out my twitter @dorkpatroller for the link, or follow just for fun.


	4. Forgiveness Comes At The Highest Cost

_So best think twice, before you break commandments._

_Forgiveness comes at the highest cost._

 

The tension in the air is so thick Odin thinks it could suffocate a man. The traitor stares at him and he must recognize him as one of Prince Leo's retainers because he reacts like he knows Odin’s face. He looks startled, perhaps, but he lifts his hands in a defensive position. He doesn’t know that he’s about to die. He just knows he needs to put up a fight. It’s not his fault that he’s helpless.

 

A black aura forms around that man’s hand while he begins chanting a spell, but Odin can’t focus on the words of it. Will it summon lightning? Will it turn him to dust? It might, were it not that his demon was already planning his death. His vision flashes white again, the way it did when the demon first took his body. His vision fades, his throat burns, light pours out of him from even the pores of his skin. He imagines this overwhelming pain is what burning in hell feels like. It’s so hot it feels icy. Every individual nerve is screaming at his brain, and their cries resonate in a pitch so high it makes his ears throb like they'll burst. He feels chapped. Not just his lips, not just his fingertips, but every bit of his skin is dry like it could flake off in layers. He's reliving the same pain from the ball. He wants to close his eyes, close his mouth, but he simply can't. A magic that he couldn't control on his own, magic that doesn't even _belong_ to him, it’s eating him alive trying to fill its purpose.

 

He did this to himself, he knows, but he’s just so tired. When will it finally be over? Live or die, Odin simply wants to _rest_.

 

He faints again. This time he doesn’t wake up in a soft bed. This time he wakes to jagged pain that he can’t even identify. Is it his chest? His stomach? His legs? Everything is still on fire, but he’s on the ground, on his back. He _screams_ . It’s silent, but it rips through his raw throat and he wonders if this _is_ hell. Maybe he died a long time ago and all of this has been imaginary. Maybe he died at the ball. Maybe he’s living his personal hell _right now_ , and he has no idea.

 

“Odin,” Leo’s voice is so strained. Odin can barely hear it, but he feels Leo gently push down on his chest. “Odin, please, lay back down.” He pushes firmer. Odin realizes that he’s been _writhing_. His shoulder blades are digging into the ground and his back is arched in a perfect bow, but he just can’t escape this suffering.

 

“Odin, can you hear me?” Leo asks. Odin forces his eye open to look at him… but tears are blurring his vision anyway. Leo sighs and reaches to swipe at a tear with his finger. “Shh, please, Odin. Breathe for me. Take a deep, long breath if you can.”

 

He can’t. Odin is sure of that. He does _try_ to breathe. He sucks in a jagged, shallow breath that burns on the way down. He squeezes his eyes shut again, jerks his head because he's doing his best to stay still as Leo asked. A new pain forms right under his ribs. It's a slice, a gash right in his skin, but it wasn't inflicted by any blade. Not long after it opens the familiar sting of a heal spell starts to mend it shut.

 

Leo reaches for Odin’s hand. He takes it in both of his and squeezes it. He rubs his thumbs along his knuckles. He tries to sound strong, but Odin can hear in his voice that he wants to cry. He’s not sure he’s seen Leo cry. They’ve been through so much together--he’s seen Leo lose friends and family. He’s sure that he _does_ cry. He just tends to be more private about it, Odin supposes.

 

Odin cries at the drop of a hat. Happy tears, angry tears, tears of sorrow. His emotions bubble and overflow and he is at their mercy. He never has been good at stopping them. He’s crying now, too, salty tears that feel abrasive while they drag right down his cheeks, past his ears, and into the dirt.

 

“We saw the lights,” Leo says. He means the magic. Odin sucks in a sharp breath. It's jagged like there's sand in his lungs. A new wound opens on his thigh. Is this how he’ll die? Niles won’t be able to keep up with healing these wounds forever. “I’m not sure how you got out without waking us, but you found the traitor. He’s dead.”

 

God, he wants to pay attention to Leo, but his voice sounds so soothing and Odin’s mind is flashing in red and black, urging him to address the pain he’s in. Doesn’t it know it’s the cause? This is all in his head, none of this is real. Or maybe this is very real, and he’s finally dying. A string of curses slips past Odin’s lips. No one can hear them, but he still means every forsaken word for all the pain he’s in. Leo anxiously asks Niles, “What is he saying?”

 

Niles can't be bothered to look for long because he's trying to close these wounds. They're opening faster than he can heal them. Still, he swiftly glances up just enough to catch three words, and then he looks back at his work while he says "Nothing pretty."

 

No, certainly not. Pretty isn’t on Odin’s mind. But the pain seems to be ebbing, slowly like a muscle cramp that’s easing away. Enough that he thinks to open his eyes and squeeze Leo’s hand in return. When he does Leo sighs, cautiously. He moves one of his hands and touches the center of Odin’s chest. It’s perfectly in line with his heart, now. That spirit mark, that is. The beast depicted has its wings spread wide, stretching out over Odin’s collarbones and it’s dramatically stretching out towards his heart. Almost there. It’s just slightly to the right of it. Odin can see it when he glances at his own chest. It doesn’t have far to go, now, before it’s captured his heart.

 

“I fear that once you killed him, this demon made up for lost time,” Leo mumbles. “It’s moved dramatically, but we still have a little time.”

 

Niles heals the last wound. Odin's entire body sinks into the dirt. Every muscle in him was wound up tight, ready to snap, but now all at once, they're uncoiled. He feels like his limbs could just melt right off. He relaxes into the dirt and tries not to close his eyes to sleep. This is the most relaxed he’s felt in days. He supposes all it takes is a demon tearing you to ribbon.

 

“Some of these will scar,” Niles admits. Odin isn’t sure why he cares. Maybe it’s a layer of guilt that Niles is trying to hide. He seemed upset he couldn’t get rid of the bruise either, but Leo is right. Who cares if he bruises or scars, so long as he doesn’t develop an infection that speeds along his death? “Milord, does this mean that he can die now? Contractually, that is.”

 

Leo nods his head. “With the demon’s half of the bargain kept, then yes. Nothing is stopping Odin from dying at any moment. But we are close to the fort and we need to press on.”

 

Niles nods his head. He moves to grab for one of Odin's hands and wraps his other arm around his back to force him to sit up. It doesn't _hurt_ , but the idea that Niles intends for him to stand in a moment is enough that Odin wants to cry. His head lulls against Niles’s chest. He closes his eyes to rest, and maybe to motivate himself to try to stand, and he feels Niles’s warm, chapped lips press against his forehead. “Come on, Mr. Chosen One. You can do this.”

 

Odin snorts a weak, sarcastic laugh. He shakes his head weakly. He’s not feeling much like a Chosen One these days. He blinks his eyes open when he feels a hand--Leo’s hand--grip his chin gently. His eyelashes stick together, they’re still damp, but he looks at Leo with bleary eyes and the weakest smile he’s ever smiled. He’s sure he’s going to tilt his chin up to look at the mark that’s trailing down his throat and smothering his chest. He always does.

 

This time, though, he tilts his chin up and he leans down to kiss him. Their mouths fit together just right and Odin’s eyes drop closed again. He tries to find a word, any word, that would properly describe this. Long-overdue is all he comes up with. Niles has already kissed him like this, but Leo has seemed so hesitant.

 

He’s probably hesitant because he knows Odin is a dead man walking. Be that as it may, Odin is so happy that he faced his fears and gave in to this kiss. Long-overdue, but still among the greatest kisses of his life. Not that he’s had many, but enough to know that this one was worth the wait. Odin sighs softly, he needs to breathe, but even then Leo chases his lips and catches the corner of his mouth in a last, needy peck.

 

“You’re the greatest hero I’ve ever known, Odin, and you’ve never come back from an impossible quest beaten before. I need you to stand, now,” Leo says, and it makes Odin’s chest thrum with pride. Leo wraps his arm around Odin's other side and together with Niles, they lift him to his feet. His legs feel like pudding, wobbly and weak. The way they feel after a hard workout—like they're holding up but they're liable to collapse at any moment.

 

Oh, but Odin wants to stand so badly. He wants to make them proud. They both have so much faith in him, and even if he feels like death is rapidly coming for him he doesn't want them to know. He wants to be their strong, Chosen Hero until he draws his last breath. He takes a step, and then another, but on the third, he stumbles and starts to fall. Leo and Niles hoist him back up to his feet, with most of his weight supported on their shoulders. Niles catches his temple in another kiss on the way up. Odin wishes he could apologize for the fact that it’s probably sweaty.

 

“Ride with me,” Leo says. He gets up onto his horse and Niles helps Odin climb up behind him. It’s not easy, but the relief of knowing he won’t slow them down is enough that he sighs away his tension. Leo is wearing all his armor, but Odin lays his cheek against the cool metal of the back of his shoulder anyway. He wraps his arms tightly around Leo’s middle, and after they’ve started moving Leo gently folds one of his arms over Odin’s. Odin is sure of it now. He can die happy.

 

…

 

Odin napped while they rode. He has no idea how he achieved it without falling off the horse. In fact, he's sure he has Leo to thank for that. But he napped against Leo's back for a few hours, and when he woke up again he was ready to try walking on his own.

 

It’s been going alright. His legs are steady now, and he can keep pace with them. A few parts of him are still sore, but he pushes through because they need to make good time. Which is exactly why he doesn’t need the distraction that stumbles his way.

 

He’s distracted anyway. There’s a little girl in pigtails. She’s just a toddler, in a fluffy dress with plenty of petticoats and she’s sitting down in the grass making flower crowns. She’s remarkably adorable with her tongue sticking out of the corner of her mouth. She’s concentrating deeply.

 

He stops walking and sways where he stands, watching her. He’s still trying to decide if she’s real or not. Surely no one would leave their baby out here to play in the cold woods alone. They’re not exceptionally dangerous woods, but they’ve got enough dangers that _he_ certainly wouldn’t let his baby play alone.

 

She turns her head and when her eyes lock onto his he realizes this is certainly a hallucination. Her eyes are stunning, bright green. The same green as his actually. Eyes he got from his mother. Between that and her big, messy, blonde pigtails, he’s certain this is a vision of his mother when she was a girl. He can almost feel it, his connection to her. His blood is hers.

 

She bounds over to him and he crouches to her height. His knees scream at him for straining his muscles to do this, but he’s absolutely mesmerized by her. She’s precious, and his lips spread into a wide smile. When he first came back in time to see his mother as a younger adult, he was startled. He was overly emotional to see her alive and safe, knowing he could stop her death.

 

 _You’re fake,_ He wants to say to this version of her. She’s certainly imaginary, but she’s cute, so far.

 

When will she turn into a demon? They all do. Or, that is, the girl in his dreams hasn't, but she certainly has betrayed him by sending him off to his death with the creepy boy. He doesn't get to tell her that she's fake or cute, of course. Instead, she throws out her hand and he thinks maybe she's going to sign the way that the other girl does. She doesn't. She strikes one of Odin's trademark poses, her hand curled in triumph and valor, and she's a vision of cuteness while she does it. “The time has come for a hero to rise!” She giggles. “Or a heroine!”

 

It’s just as she says those words that she begins to dissolve. She doesn’t melt or become a macabre monster. She just glows a soft, gentle pink and fades into the light. Odin pushes himself back up to his feet and stares at the spot where she just was. Maybe he imagined it, but he thinks she had Naga’s brand on her arm. His mother never did have that. He jogs to catch up with Leo and Niles.

 

…

 

They walk a while longer and Odin feels shaky. Maybe he's just overdoing it. He starts to drag behind too far and Niles slows up to hold his hand while they walk. He keeps asking him if he wants to ride, but Odin doesn't need to. Eventually, Leo decides they all need to take a short break and eat something. Odin does eat a little dried meat and bread, but as soon as he's finished he slumps down and lays his head in Niles's lap.

 

Niles clicks his tongue at him but he doesn't actually make him move, In fact, his voice turns into a softer hum and he plays with Odin's hair. "You'll have to be this affectionate once you're cured, too," he says. "I've been spoiled, now."

 

Leo unrolls a small map. He lays it out between himself and Niles. Odin doesn't much pay attention but they both look at it. "This is where we are," Leo says. He points out a landmark they just passed, a small, star-shaped pond. Odin thought it was interesting, but he wonders mostly if nature formed it that way or if a man did. While they passed it Leo mentioned a legend that a shooting star fell there, and created the lake. That's a nice story.

 

Leo shifts his finger not far away. “This is where we’re going. If we keep this pace we’ll make it before nightfall.”

 

Odin notices Leo push the book and quill towards him. He swallows the knot forming in his throat. “How are you feeling, Odin?” Leo asks. Odin doesn’t want to admit that he’s feeling awful. He’s feeling like he may not make it after all. He’s feeling weak. So he writes something else.

 

_When did you know that you loved me?_

 

Leo stares at the book and shrugs his shoulders. It's not exactly a gesture he does often because he rarely admits to being completely unsure of something. Even so, he says, "It's been so long, Odin. I know that I loved Niles at first sight. The affection and need for companionship were mutual. You were different. I didn’t want to love you. Falling in love with you happened slowly, and so gradually I can’t say that I felt it. I just know that once it grew in size enough, it was obvious that I had loved you the whole time.”

 

Niles makes a soft noise that nearly startles Odin. He’s caught between thinking about how that was the most wonderful thing anyone’s ever said to him and wondering why the ends of his limbs feel numb. He realizes it’s because he’s dozing off. Niles coos at him. “You’re falling asleep, luv. We don’t have time for a nap.”

 

“Let him relax, Niles,” Leo says. “It’s only a few minutes.”

 

Niles chuckles and nods his head. “Alright, then. If that’s the case I suppose I’ll bore you into a proper sleep.”

 

Odin wants to argue that he's not boring, but his voice does sound soothing enough that he nods his head and settles with his eyes closed again in his lap. Niles trails his fingers past the ends of his hair and along his neck, drawing invisible patterns in his shoulders. "When milord realized he had feelings for you, he thought it would hurt my feelings. Instead, I had the pleasure of telling him that I _also_ had feelings for you. We sat down and talked it over. You and won the hearts of both of us, perhaps the most closed off men in the castle, like it was nothing. Do you know why that is, Odin?”

 

Odin wants to ask but his voice doesn't work and he's not willing to move. He tries to hum the question but it doesn't even squeak out of his throat. Niles doesn't need to be prompted. He bends closer and lowers his voice like he's speaking just a bit more intimately. Not so that Leo can't hear, but so that Odin certainly does. "It's because you fell from the heavens, Odin, and you have wings brighter than the moon. You're too good for either of us combined, I'll have you know, but the stars can't have you back."

 

Niles has never been inclined to talk like that before, but it’s romantic in an odd way. Like he’s doing his best to appeal to the part of Odin that has been silenced for so long. He falls asleep thinking he should thank him for that when he wakes up.

 

…

 

They can see the castle on the horizon. Odin is incredibly relieved. They’re so close he can _taste_ it, and while he’s not sure that they’ll even find what they’re looking for here, he’s certain that he wants to get off his feet. His body feels so fragile right now. Brittle, like any tap could shatter him. He’s just exhausted. Even when he sleeps it feels like he hasn’t. How long can one man live without being rested?

 

He knows he shouldn’t dwell on it, but now and then the thought crosses his mind that if he does die, at least he’ll be able to finally sleep. The bags under his eyes are weights on his heart. If he were to die today, would it be selfish? Niles and Leo want him to survive, and Odin wants to survive for them. With them. But he’s tired, he’s so tired. When is he allowed to give up?

 

He can’t give up. He loves them, and they love him just as much. They’ve been tireless trying to save him, and their words of encouragement or promises of forever give him the strength to _try_ to keep carrying on. Besides, they’ve made it this far without trouble. No more broken bridges, no more injuries. No monsters.

 

Then Odin hears a scream.

 

His first reaction is to jump out of his skin, and for a moment he's glad that his loves are walking a few paces ahead of him because he looks like a fool when he does. His second is to figure out if it's real. He suspects that it isn't. He looks at the back of Niles’s head, and then Leo’s. They didn’t react, and so that confirms his suspicion: it’s not real. Odin is tempted to just ignore it, but the screaming doesn’t stop and it tugs at his heart. There’s an overwhelming instinct buried deep inside of him that tells him he needs to do _something_ . He simply _must_ do something. So he turns around.

 

He’s barely turned completely when a child barrels into him at top speed. He swings his arms around Odin. He’s only there a few seconds before Odin’s shirt feels wet with tears. He's only just barely as tall as Odin's chest, and his hair is soft and blonde--not dirty or singed at all. It's the same length and shade as the boy who normally scares him, he seems to be the same age and height, but could this be the same child? He's never spoken to Odin before, never made a noise at all. The real shame is that it's impossible to tell. It's hard to make out anything else about this boy because he's got his whole face tucked into Odin's stomach and he's sobbing, hysterically. Odin hugs him, gently, thinking it might help. Instead, the boy claws at Odin's hips and another scream rips through him.

 

“Dad! Please! It hurts, it _hurts!”_ he cries.

 

Odin’s heart sinks like bricks in water. He doesn’t know what hurts. He seems perfectly fine, just a little shaken up. Odin just needs to _know_ , or he won’t be able to help him. He wants to help him so badly it could kill him. _Tell me what hurts,_ he wants to say.

 

“Help, _help!”_ His next cry for help is a scream so shrill Odin lets go of the boy and flinches back. In that same moment, the boy _explodes_ into a million lights. Not gracefully, not into soft light the way that the little girl did. In fact, these lights are moving, buzzing, and a swarm of fireflies overtake Odin in place of where that child just was. They crawl up his arms, flitter around his face, and crawl past his eyes.

 

He can vaguely hear Niles and Leo calling his name as he faints.


	5. I Knew I'd Fail You

_ I knew I’d fail you _

_ From the moment that I looked into your eyes. _

 

Odin is limply tucked onto a lounge in the abandoned fort’s dusty study. The cushion of it is large enough to fit two people comfortably, maybe even three, but it’s posing as a seat meant only for one. Niles has propped pillows under Odin’s shoulders and neck and head to keep him as comfortable as possible. He’s pulled over a couple of blankets to keep him warm. It’s been a few hours since he collapsed in the woods, screaming and scratching at his own face. It gave Niles a small heart attack when it happened, he was genuinely afraid he would claw out is own eyes. He passed out before he could, and Niles has already healed the scrapes on his cheeks. His eyes are fine, but they won’t open. He’s wondering if they’ll ever open again. Maybe this is the beginning of the end of Odin Dark. 

 

Niles is more worried about Odin now than he's ever worried about anything in his whole life. He can't focus on anything but checking him over and wringing his hands together anxiously. Odin looks terribly weak, on this lounge. Niles hasn't left his side since they arrived here. Every time he looks away a new sore opens on his skin that needs to be healed. Just like in the woods, but this time Odin isn't writhing or cursing or arching in pain. He's just laying there, too weak to fight it. 

 

Niles is hyper-aware of the positioning of that demon mark on his chest, now. The black, inky beast is right over his heart like it's about to feast on its prey. Niles draws his finger along it and every time he does he gets a chill that wraps around his entire heart and squeezes. It’s like a voice in the back of his mind that shouts  _ don’t interfere _ , but he’s going to. He won’t just give up now and let this demon have him. Niles didn’t think, earlier in his adult life or even childhood, that he would have a husband. Having two is a little extreme to make up for that, but he wants them both. Living the rest of his life with just Leo would still be a dream come true, but imagining that life without Odin is hard. 

 

It would be so quiet.

 

The study they’re in once belonged to Leo’s grandfather. It’s covered in a layer of dust as thick as a coin and cobwebs hang from the ceiling. It’s dark, but Niles has already started a fire in the fireplace and Leo has pulled back some drapes to let in a bit more natural light. There are rows of bookcases from floor to ceiling, books that must not be that important because they've been left here unguarded for years. Some shelves have medicinal bottles and dried herbs, but nothing Niles felt could benefit Odin. 

 

Although Odin has been asleep since they arrived, Leo has been studying nonstop. As soon as they laid Odin down together he started sifting through books. He plucked them off the shelves by their spines and piled them up on the desk that must have belonged to the late king. He brought a book to Niles, too, and Niles has done his best to sift through it between pausing to heal Odin. He’s just not a fast reader, not like Leo is, but he can skim. He thinks if he saw the words ‘demon’ or ‘spirit’ or ‘pact’ or ‘curse’ he would know to stop. 

 

They simply must find something,  _ anything at  _ all, before Odin loses his fight. Niles doesn’t want to even entertain the idea. Only a few days ago Odin was his normal, bubbly self. He was chattering at Niles and Niles made a mistake. He told him to hush, for one reason or another. Someone was making a speech at the ball. How was Niles supposed to know when he was hushing him that he would never hear his voice again? 

 

He’s never wanted to hear someone screaming idiocy about umbral spells or aching blood like he does now. 

 

He’s so lost in thought thinking about how badly he wants Odin to wake up and talk to him that he jolts when Odin suddenly gasps. He hasn’t made a noise like that in hours. Niles frantically searches him over for a wound, wondering where it is and how deep for it to cause him that much pain. Instead of spotting an injury, he watches as Odin blinks open his eyes. They're still that lovely green, but so dull and tired. It hurts to look at them because Niles knows how bright and full of inspiration and life they're meant to be. Odin stares at Niles, watches in silence, and he looks confused. He looks scared. His fingers twitch, and Niles reaches for his hand. 

 

It’s clear to him that Odin’s fear stems from the fact that he can’t move. If he can’t move because he’s in too much pain or because that demon has paralyzed him, Niles doesn’t care. He gently pushes on Odin’s shoulders like he’s guiding him into the pillows more. “Stay down,” he pleads in a croak of a voice. “I’m right here. How do you feel?”  

 

Odin shakes his head slowly and sadly left and right. Nile’s heart sinks.  _ Please don’t give up. If you give up now this will all be for nothing. _ “Leo and I have been looking for a cure in this library. Just stay strong and hold on for us. We’re not letting you go without a fight.” It feels cruel to tell Odin to stay strong when he so clearly looks like he would rather just die and get it over with. It’s no secret that he’s weak, but that he keeps trying to act strong for them is heroic as ever. Odin starts to move his lips, or to at least try to communicate, but instead, he hisses in pain and winces his eyes closed. Niles sees a new wound form on Odin’s cheek. It's immensely terrible to watch his skin just unravel itself like it's being ripped open by this invisible force. 

 

Niles reaches for his heal staff. “I have enough magic here to heal an army,” He promises. He tries to sound confident, tries to keep a smile, but it’s all too forced and he isn’t good at being optimistic. That’s Odin’s department, and Niles is sick of doing his job. He wants to go back to being sarcastic, making improper jokes, and just being… normal. He wants Leo to go back to rolling his eyes at them and taking them for granted. He wants Odin to smile again. Real smiles, the sort where he reaches up and wipes the corner of his eye because he’s made himself cry laughing. 

 

Niles has enough magic to heal an army, perhaps, but the real question is does he have enough strength to use it? Magic drains the user fast, and Niles is weary. They all are. Odin gasps again, a broken, terrible sound. The only sound he can make at all, and it’s like the air is scraping across his throat on the way in. Two more open, raw sores form across his chest, and a gash cuts across his side. Niles tries not to look too panic-stricken, but Odin has already fainted again.

 

Leo wanders closer and while Niles tends to these new wounds, he admires Odin. He’s got a book in his arms, a page marked by his finger while he holds it close to his chest. He was probably listening in when he heard Niles talking to Odin. Once he’s finished his task, Niles looks over his shoulder at him, feeling helpless. “He’s dying, Leo. We need to fix this  _ now _ .” 

 

Leo looks so heartbroken. Now that he’s got a better look at him, it’s hard to miss. Leo blames himself for this, of course. Odin is his retainer, and he probably thinks Odin sacrificed himself like this because of that. It’s not true. Anyone with a brain can do this math: Odin sacrificed himself because he saw that the men he was in love with were in danger. Leo blames himself anyway, though, and Niles almost regrets putting him on the spot like that. Almost, because it’s got to be him. Niles can’t get any productive reading done, not when he can’t set down this heal staff for more than ten seconds at a time. So Leo looks heartbroken, but he nods his head and walks silently back to the desk. Niles opens his mouth and a quiet squeak comes out, but no words. Maybe he should tell him to come sit on this lounge with Odin. Maybe that would make him feel better, because at least then if Odin dies before they can find an answer Leo can hold his hand and send him off with his love and well-wishes.

 

…

 

By now Niles feels like he might just fall over and die himself. He’s losing energy fast. Every time he uses his spells his head throbs right between his eyes and he’s dizzy. He hasn’t slept in gods know how many hours at this point. Odin is so pale, he’s fading fast, and he’s just so weak. He hasn’t stirred, but the rise and fall of his chest are just slow enough that Niles is on edge. He's not doing anything, not even reacting to the pain except to gasp when it's so bad it wakes him. 

 

Well, he is awake. Niles is almost certain of it. He thinks he sees Odin's eyelids twitch now and then in response to the things they're saying or even just the sound of their voice. Maybe it's just the light of the candle when Leo walks it over. He seems like he wants to open them, but something is physically forcing them closed. It's worse than sleeping. At least if he were sleeping he might not be suffering as badly as this. 

 

Niles looks up at the sound of Leo’s footsteps across the floor. “There’s nothing,” Leo says. He closes the book he’s been reading. When he picked it up and realized it was the late king’s journal, he sounded hopeful. He thought he had found the key. Anything about the king’s old retainer would be in here. But as the minutes ticked into hours, his eyes grew weary and bags formed under them, but he didn’t find his answer. Clearly. 

 

“There’s always the next book,” Niles says as optimistically as he can. He just wishes Odin could encourage Leo, too. If he could even smile at him, reassure him, maybe this would be easier. 

 

“No, Niles, you don’t understand. There’s nothing. Odin made a deal with a demon and this demon is stronger than anything I could ever do to save him.” Leo wraps his arms around himself turns away from Niles to walk closer to the fire. Once there he tosses another dusty log into it, and he watches it catch. Niles feels sick to his stomach.

 

“What are you saying?” 

 

There, staring at the flames while they lick over that log, Leo goes on to say, “He’s going to die. By prolonging it like this, we’re probably hurting him more than we’re doing good.

 

Rage and denial and sorrow flash through Niles all at once. Leo is staring at the fire, not looking at him, but he can see the way his shoulders are tense. Niles is afraid of this. He’s afraid to lose him. He knows if he just stares after Leo he’ll cry, so he snaps his head away from Leo to look at Odin instead. 

 

He’s not much better. He’s sweaty, he’s broken, and his breathing has turned raspy. Even so, he’s here. He’s alive, and Niles has kept him that way for this long. It hasn’t been easy. He’s used up enough magic that he’s broken one of the staves on it. He’s terrified, he’s exhausted, but so is Odin, and  _ he _ didn’t give up. He hasn’t given up on himself, and he would never, ever give up on one of them.  His voice cracks but he turns back to Leo and says “Then you heal him! I’ll do the reading! He’s alive, Leo, right here. We can’t just give up and let him die.” 

 

Leo’s steps thud on the stone floor. He walks back to the desk first, where he picks up the book he had in his hands earlier. He brings it with him while he comes closer and sits at the side of the lounge. Just for a moment he reaches out and holds Odin’s cheek in his hand. He brushes his thumb along it, and he smiles such a sad smile. Niles swears he can see Odin nuzzle into it, but he doesn’t. He doesn’t move at all. “I’m not letting him go without a fight, Niles.” 

 

Oh. Leo has a plan. Niles nods his head, ready to accept that they’re going to do something crazy, but then Leo turns and rubs his palm over his face much the same way he just did to Odin. "Calm down," He says softly. "Take a deep breath. We both need to be level headed. What we’re about to do is very, very risky.” 

 

He’s shaking. Niles feels nauseous, tired, and everything is aching… but Odin has felt much worse, and he would do anything to make this work. He’s let himself be soft for him. They gave him his ring, asked him to marry them. He’s worked hard to keep his walls down so that Odin could enjoy this affection while he still can. It’s just that he’s been so affectionate  _ back _ . Odin loves them so much, and he has so much love left in his heart to give. More than a demon can take. 

 

“What do we do?” Niles croaks. Leo drops his hand from Niles’s face and instead sets it in his own lap.

 

"We have to let Odin die because then the demon sharing his body will be forced to leave. We both know that a man already dead can only be revived with a spell in the first few seconds. Once  _ his _ spirit leaves his body, he’s gone forever.” 

 

Niles’s eye stings. He’s never wanted to cry this much before in his life. Losing people he loves isn’t what he signed up for when he opened his heart up to them. “You want us to let him die, hope the demon leaves his body fast enough, and just… hope that we can revive him? We--We’re going to let Odin die. Is this really the plan?” 

 

“It’s the only option, Niles. I’ve wasted enough time reading. I’m not a trained necromancer and I’m not at all equipped for  _ this _ , but it’s all we can do. Once the demon leaves his body, I’ll revive him and you’ll heal him.” 

 

Niles thinks he could laugh at how pitiful this is turning out to be if he didn’t hear Odin gasp again. He looks back at him and reaches for the heal staff so he can heal the little wound that just opened on his shoulder. Leo covers his hand with his own. Niles hesitates. 

 

Oh. See, this is worse. It’s not just letting Odin die peacefully. It’s not as if he’ll just pass on knowing what their plan is. He’s going to hurt, he’s going to  _ suffer _ . All of these wounds Niles has been staving off, all of the pain will be there. It will be gruesome. Niles sucks in a sharp breath. “Leo, what if it doesn’t  _ work _ ?” 

 

“Then Odin will be dead. He’s going to die one way or another. Niles, this is our  _ only _ chance." The shallow rise and fall of Odin's chest are interrupted by another tiny gasp. Two cuts appear on his chest. It's not fair. He doesn’t deserve this, not any of it. He’s not the sort of light meant to be snuffed out.

 

Letting Odin die is by far the most terrible, awful idea Niles has ever heard. What if they’re  _ wrong _ ? What if there is a cure, what if they’re sentencing him to death? What if they do this wrong and somehow turn him into a monster, like the faceless? But they're not strong enough to keep him alive through the night, at this rate. It would be for the best if they saved their magic to revive him. And if it doesn't work… well, at least Odin can finally  _ sleep _ . 

 

Leo steps away to pick up a spell book. It’s just sitting there on the desk. It's a deep, muddy purple shade with faded, silvery pentagrams on the front. The text isn't in any language that Niles speaks, but he knows that Leo and Odin are more versed in ancient texts. Most mages are. He looks at the book, curiously. Where did it come from? It's awfully convenient for a book on necromancy to just be here by happenstance. "Milord?" 

 

“My grandfather tried and failed to do this,” Leo admits with a solemn voice. “He had the book on his desk, but until I read his journal I didn’t know what for. That said, he was not a mage. He had no experience with magic at all, and I do. He also didn’t have someone here to heal his retainer, but you’re here for Odin. We can do this.” 

 

The only thing swirling around in Niles’s mind is the opposite side of that coin. There’s a fair chance that they can’t. They’re not experienced with  _ this _ magic. Based on how Leo is speaking, Niles would be willing to bet that even an experienced necromancer would struggle to pull this off. What if the demon won’t leave quickly enough?

 

They both stand in front of the lounge. They’re doing this. They’ve agreed. Leo is right. Odin is going to die one way or another, and using this spell to save him is their only lead on a cure. He can’t imagine the pain they’ll face if he dies, though. What would they do with themselves if they lost him tonight, only to find a cure tomorrow? 

 

Odin has grave pain etched into the lines of his face. Where he normally has these unexpectedly cute lines near his eyes from laughing, now he’s scrunched up with agony. A dull, pink glow forms at the end of Niles’s fingertips on both of his hands. Healing magic. He wants to heal him—he wants to keep his  _ fiancé  _ safe. How can letting him suffer and die to be right? But Leo looks away from the spell he’s opened the tome to just long enough to reach out and take Niles’s hand. 

 

“You can’t,” he whispers. 

 

Niles  _ knows _ . He knows he can’t heal him, but he  _ wants to _ .

 

It ultimately only takes a matter of minutes. As soon as Niles stops interfering and healing him, Odin’s body collapses under itself. His skin rips open in some more places, oozing slow dribbles of blood. Only a minute or two passes and his chest struggles to rise and fall. He’s sweating, there are  _ tears _ tracking down his cheeks. He’s awake. Niles knows it, Leo knows it. He’s trapped in there while his body dies around him, and he’s in so much pain, too much pain. Part of Niles just wishes the gods would take him. Please, take him. He’s suffered enough. 

 

Odin starts choking and gasping. Soon his lungs betray him altogether, so Niles turns his head to the side and screws his eye shut tight. He can’t watch Odin die. He’s seen a hundred men die in his life, but he can’t watch Odin die. This is different. This is his loudmouth. This is his fiancé, his morning person, his childish preference for cocoa over tea. This is his  _ hero _ , and seeing him fall is devastating. 

 

The choking stops before Niles can count to ten. The choking stops, his breathing stops, and the moment it does Niles looks back. Odin doesn’t look dead, not really. It only just happened. His chest isn’t moving and his lungs are silent, but he still has the remains of his color. He’s warm to the touch. He’s the beautiful sort of dead where it seems like a prince should swoop down and kiss him back to life. But if all it took to break this spell was true love’s kiss, it would have been over long ago.

 

Odin is dead. The demon got what it wanted. They had an arrangement, and Odin’s end of this bargain has been held up. The seconds pass like hours. Each one that passes makes a ringing in Niles’s ears grow louder.  They tick in the back of Niles’s mind like a timer counting down to when he’s gone forever. On the fourth second the image on his chest curls into itself until it just disappears altogether. On the fifth second, Leo starts chanting a spell. 

 

Leo’s voice is strong, stronger than it’s ever been. He is unwavering in the words of the spell, he doesn’t stumble over pronunciations. Niles looks back at him and he’s  _ surprised _ to see tears slipping down his face, considering how strong he sounds. He can see that his eyelashes are damp, but he can’t hear those tears. 

 

He’s not  _ that  _ surprised. Actually, the fact that Leo’s fingers are shaking where they grip his tome is the most normal thing to happen all day. He’s just as heartbroken and scared as Niles is. He must feel twice as bad. He came up with this plan. He suggested they kill him. He didn’t have the privilege Niles did, either. He had to keep his eyes on Odin for every second, watch him gasp and writhe and fight to take in that breath that he simply couldn’t. Leo had to watch him die, so he didn’t miss his chance. 

 

Niles isn’t as brave as his lovers—either of them—and he knows that now more than ever. He turns to look at Odin for any sign this is working. Leo keeps chanting, but nothing seems to be happening. Leo’s voice starts to tremble. Niles’s heart is beating so hard it hurts his chest. It’s drumming in his ears. He can barely make out the words Leo is trying to say. 

 

Odin  _ gasps _ . It’s dry and tiny and so weak, but Leo stutters over the last of the spell and chokes out the desperate order “Now, Niles!” 

 

Leo doesn’t have to say it. As soon as he hears that gasp Niles has his hands on Odin’s chest. Just over his heart, pushing magic as raw and jagged as Niles’s emotions feel directly into him. “Please,” He whispers. This has been the worst journey of his life. Odin has been silent, eerily unable to cheer them on. They’ve been broken. They’ve had to act strong and confident while they watched the man they loved slowly get weaker and weaker. They had to cope with knowing it was their fault. Odin made that deal for them, after all, and they repaid him by letting him go. They watched him  _ die _ . Niles can’t stand the silence any longer. “Please, please.” 

 

Live for us, because we love you. Live for us, because we need you. Live for us, because no one deserves it more than you. 

 

_ Please, live. _


	6. It’s Time For You To Find Me

_ I never see the forest for the trees, _

_ I could really use your melody. _

_ Baby, I'm a little blind, I think it's time for you to find me. _

 

With everything that’s been ruining his life over the past few days, it’s not uncommon for Odin to wake up to a coughing fit. In fact, he might dare to say he’s used to it. He hacks and chokes but can’t catch his breath right away. It takes him a few seconds, but when he does he finds that everything is a fog. He can’t remember anything of how he got into this bed, but when he tries to sit up he finds he can't. Leo and Niles are both draped over him, sleeping. He also finds that it’s not a bed at all, but an extravagant lounge chair large enough to hold their entire, sleeping family.

 

Or they  _ were _ sleeping, but Odin imagines that his coughing fit is why both of them are looking at him warily. Niles clears his throat to chase away his sleep, but he still croaks.  “Are you alright?” 

 

Odin shakes his head ‘no’ and covers his mouth with his fist to cough a few more times. He's got a tickle that he can't seem to clear out, but now that he thinks about it, he feels great. Sure, he's a little tired, but he feels more rested than he has in days. Like he could stand up and jump up and down. He isn't nauseous at all, in fact, he's starving. He feels  _ good _ . Just like he inhaled a little bit of dust, and that once he coughs it up he’ll be fine. 

 

_ Leo _ looks like he may fall right back to sleep. His hair is sticking up in weird directions where he slept on Odin, but even more than that he looks completely exhausted. His eyes have dark moons wrapped beneath them like he didn't actually sleep at all. But even though he looks like, by all means, he should stay down… Leo sits up just enough that he can touch Odin's neck. He trails his fingertips over his throat and a tiny smile tugs up the corner of his mouth. 

 

"It's gone, Odin," He says softly. For a few seconds, Odin is confused. Then he looks down at his chest, still bare from the night before, and he doesn’t see the marking anymore. He’s ecstatic! He doesn’t know what they did or how they did it, but he knows he needs to thank them both. His thoughts stutter to a stop, however, when Niles curls up his whole hand around Odin’s throat. The apple of his throat bobs as he swallows back another cough. Niles doesn’t grip hard, and Odin isn’t afraid. 

 

Odin’s skin tingles while Niles uses healing magic on him… and his cough dies in his throat. Leo sighs and rubs his eyes. “I don’t know if the curse will reverse. The scars that Niles wasn't able to heal are still on your body, and the damage that the demon did to you may be permanent. Worst of all, I'm not certain that you'll ever be able to speak again… but we should count our blessings that you're not dying." 

 

Odin thinks about that girl from his dreams. He thinks about the way her braid fell over her shoulder and how her nightgown gathered, and the sweet smile she had while she taught him how to use sign language. She was patient with him, but only if he would listen to her and give her advice in return. She laughed with him and joked with him… but she said that it was important he knows how to use his signs. 

 

Perhaps she was a premonition of what is to come? Even so, he would much prefer to speak. He certainly can’t go without even trying. He coughs once more to clear his throat, and then he hums softly just to see if his voice works. It makes a noise… and so he tries again, this time to speak. Granted, it’s slightly raspy, but he says “I think I’m fine.”

 

Leo and Niles sigh in unison. It’s a soft, dreamy sigh. They look like everything they've ever wanted has come true at that moment. Odin smiles brightly at them both. Perhaps it’s a test to see if his voice can manage without cracking, but he’s waited days to talk like himself again. Maybe he started talking the way he does to inspire his friends when the world around them was dying… but now it’s something about him that he knows his friends love—even when they act annoyed by it. He especially knows that it will relieve his loves to hear their good, old Odin. “You’ve done it! I’m cured! Let it be known—sang of far and wide—the power of your love is stronger than that of any foul demon!” 

 

Niles makes a noise caught between a whine and another happy sigh. He falls back down onto the bed, where he was recently sleeping curled up like a cat with his cheek on Odin’s thigh. “We did it,” He repeats, softly. It’s like even he can’t believe it. Odin will be sure to make sure he does.

 

"You did it!" Odin chirps happily. He leans down and kisses the back of Niles's head because that's all he can reach of him. He pets his messy, white hair. Leo is closer to him, however, so Odin loops an arm around his shoulder and drags him closer yet to plant a healthy, happy kiss on his lips.

 

Lazily, Leo reaches up and holds Odin’s face. He strokes both of his cheeks gently with his thumbs, and Odin’s eyes slip closed to enjoy the touch. He opens his eyes right back up when Leo makes a noise like a sob… but when Odin pulls back and looks at him, he doesn’t look like he’s actually crying. He must just be thinking really hard about it, Odin supposes. 

 

“I’m retiring you both,” Leo finally says. Oh, there he goes. He decided to go ahead and cry a little. It’s alright—Odin would never condemn a man for crying when he nearly lost someone beloved. Leo sniffs once and wipes his eyes with the ball of his fist… but after that, he smiles for Odin. Bright despite his exhaustion, soft and unreserved. He draws his thumb along Odin’s freckles, peachy and healthy again, and then he closes his eyes. “This has shown me the truth to your willingness to die for me, but please, Odin, never do.” 

 

Odin leans forward and nuzzles Leo’s nose with the tip of his own. Of course, he can't agree to those terms. Odin may have sworn off spirit pacts, but he would lay down his life for Leo in a heartbeat. He loves him, and it would do him good not to see anyone he loves die, not ever again. Leo huffs pathetically and returns the tiny rabbit kiss. “I’m very serious, you know. When we get home, first thing, I’m announcing our engagement. Anyone who opposes it can be damned—I won’t keep this secret any longer. We'll get retainers for the both of you if we must. Nothing like this will ever happen again." 

 

Niles snorts when Leo suggests that  _ they _ need retainers. Odin has to admit, it’s a bit of a foreign concept. He’s been Leo’s retainer for so long, simply marrying him doesn’t seem like it warrants being protected himself. He’s been a prince his whole life—not that he’s properly admitted that to Leo or Niles yet—and he never had retainers before. Even so, Odin would do anything to put Leo at ease. 

 

Niles twists his fingers up into the thin blanket over Odin’s legs. Odin was sure he was going to fall back asleep a moment ago, but he glances at him with that striking, handsome eye of his and hums thoughtfully. “I imagine you’re feeling much better than you have in days,” Niles says. It’s hard to believe this whole, terrible event took them less than a full week to experience. It was short, but it felt like endless agony the whole time.

 

“I am, actually,” Odin is happy to report. He trails his fingers through Niles’s hair. Niles softens and some tension leaves his shoulders. He’s like a happy cat there, like he could start purring at any moment. 

 

But he doesn’t purr, he just melts into Odin. “M’ glad. But we put all the magic we had into saving you, luv, so perhaps you can contain yourself for a couple hours longer. We need to sleep.” 

 

Leo nods his head. He pushes Odin back into the pillows with his hands, and Odin doesn’t protest. After he’s sure Odin is laying comfortably, Leo settles back into the crook of his arm so he can go back to sleep. He reaches his hand out to take Odin’s hand in his and he brings it to his lips to kiss. “Just a little longer,” He assures him. “Then I never want you to stop talking again.” 

 

Odin thinks sleeping in with the men of his dreams would be a pretty good way to spend the morning, anyway. He dozes off with them, with Leo tucked against his chest and Niles snoring quietly with his head on his thigh. They both have their legs woven around Odin’s in any way they can. They’re not letting him go. They’re never letting him go.

 

…

 

Their journey back home to Windmire is less urgent. They have all the time in the world to be as cautious as possible. So they take their time when they need to, they make a point to take the safer trails, and they avoid any fallen bridges. Even so, they’re still backtracking through the woods that have been haunting Odin for days, now. They seem much less dangerous now that there isn’t a demon manipulating Odin’s reality. He hasn’t had any cryptic dreams, he hasn’t seen any specters. The most haphazard thing he’s done is slip on a slick rock--and only because he was trying to show off. Niles appropriately made fun of him and healed the bruise. It vanished easily, and the relief on Niles's face when it did more than makes up for the wound to his pride.

 

Yes, everything is quite normal. That’s why, when a sense of unease and deja vu comes over him, he finds himself hesitating. Niles and Leo keep on walking just ahead of him, and he considers calling out but he doesn’t. A small path off to his left leads to a clearing in the trees. It’s not a marked path, but he’s certain that it leads to that burnt clearing. He recognizes this trail. The little boy took him down this trail. He glances at his soon-to-be-husbands once again. Niles has his hands twisted up in a leather strap, gently guiding Leo’s horse. Leo has one hand in the air, avidly chattering about something. He catches Niles look over his shoulder at him and dip his head like he’s winking. Odin closes his mouth and turns to duck through the path. “Odin?” Niles calls after him. “Odin!” 

 

Odin’s skin tingles while he sprints down the path. The hair on his arms stands up. He’s nervous! This is the same clearing, and when he arrives he’s both curious and horrified. The burnt grass, the ruined village, it’s all here. Everything is the same. The boot, the frayed doll, the crumbling pillars… He turns in a slow circle and tries to calm his racing heart. This village was supposed to be  _ made up _ . 

 

He finds himself wandering towards the center of town. He can hear Leo and Niles calling for him, but he just needs to see. The pristine building isn’t pristine anymore. Just like the rest of the ruins in this town, it’s dilapidated. The roof is caved in, the windows are shattered, and it’s covered by ash that has blown around from the rest of the village. There’s a plaque to the left that reads  _ Mother Mayri’s Home for Children _ . He's never heard of it. He's never even heard of a town situated in the middle of a forest like this. He stands on the doorstep, ready to find out what secrets these walls hold, but he hesitates. He thinks of when that boy touched the door, and he burst into flames and melted right before Odin’s eyes.

 

_ “Odin!”  _ Niles shouts. Odin gasps as he’s pulled from his thoughts and right into Niles’s arms. He reaches out and yanks hard on Odin’s hand until Odin is tucked against Niles's chest and being held in an embrace. He gently pats Niles's back to ease him out of the hug. There's no need to fear.

 

Leo is also here, and Odin has never  _ seen _ him dismount a horse as fast as he does. He rushes to join them just as Niles holds Odin’s face in his hands, and directs his eyes right to his own. “What are you looking at?” Niles asks, “It’s just a building, there’s nothing here.” 

 

Odin’s heart sags. How many times did Niles have to rescue him from his own visions? It’s no wonder he’s worried now. “Peace, Niles. I’m alright. I only see the house; I don’t think I’m hallucinating.” 

 

Leo visibly sighs. So visibly that Odin is half-certain he could melt into a puddle right there. He reaches out and curls his fingers around Odin’s hand, at his side. “Thank goodness, then. But what in the gods’ names made you run over here like a mad man?” 

 

“It’s just—!“ There’s a cough. Odin stops talking. All three of them glance at the door of the house, from which the coughing just came. There’s someone inside. It’s someone  _ important,  _ Odin can feel that in his bones. The instinct of a Chosen One is rarely wrong! Odin peels himself out of Niles and Leo’s grips to face his fears. Whatever is inside that house, he was meant to face it all along. He turns the handle and pushes open the door with a dramatic creak. 

 

There’s only natural light in here, and not much of it. It filters in through a window and highlights the dust in the air. Everything in this building is coated in ash, save for a small pile of blankets and a pillow in the middle of the sitting room floor. There is the little boy there too. He looks exactly the same as he did in the visions. Pale, grimy, covered in ash… Odin isn’t sure what about him now reads that he’s a child who needs help and not a monster to fear, but if anyone in this room is afraid it’s that boy. He looks up at Odin like a deer startled by a hunter. He looks between Odin and the two men behind him like he’s been caught stealing. 

 

He’s not stealing. He’s just wrapped up in the pile of blankets and huddled up against the chilly air. He has a half-eaten pile of berries that he probably found in the surrounding woods. They’re not harmful, just wild blueberries, but if they’re all he’s been eating it’s not a wonder that he looks so weak and underfed.

 

“What are you,” Odin starts to ask. He doesn’t get far into his question. The boy covers up his ears and shakes his head violently. Despite the reaction, his voice is soft and gentle and perfectly  _ normal _ .

 

“I can’t hear, I can’t hear you.” He shakes his head once more but then he settles his eyes right on Odin’s. “I hurt my ears in the fire, I’m sorry, I can’t hear you.” 

 

“Oh,” Leo mumbles quietly. Niles folds his arms. Odin doesn’t know what to think. Well, that isn’t true. He knows exactly what to think. He thinks about the girl who taught him to use sign language in his dreams. He thinks about how she said it was so, so urgent for him to know his signs, and she made fun of him for forgetting something she swears he’s known all her life. When his curse was broken he’d nearly forgotten she existed—after all, Odin could speak just fine, and that girl was imaginary. So was this boy, though, and here he is. Not imaginary.  

 

So he tries to react the way that she would. He talks very, very slowly. He lifts his hands and he moves them as fluidly as he can. Those dreams felt so short, and they seem so distant now, but he can recall every lesson. He can remember every word of his imaginary daughter teaching him how to break his silence while she complained about boys.

 

The dreams may still be nothing more than dreams. Just because this boy is real doesn’t mean she will be too. He needs to keep his focus on the here and now. “Can you read lips?” He asks.

 

The boy’s eyes get wider, fixated on the motion of Odin’s hands. His lips curl into a tiny smile, but then he looks back up at Odin and nods his head. “A little.” 

 

Niles and Leo swap a glance, and Odin nearly misses it if he weren’t looking over his shoulder at them. They’ve been through this once already, so perhaps they feel like veterans when it comes to communication barriers. Leo steps to Odin's side, gently settles his hand on his shoulder, and he takes his time to speak slowly. "Can you read or write?" 

 

The boy’s cheeks grow pink, and he shakes his head no. “Only my name,” He says while he looks at the floor. Niles steps around them and paces a slow circle around him. Odin wishes he wouldn’t. No one likes to be stared down, and this boy is already scared. Scared or not, however, he steels himself and looks back at Odin to speak again. “Will you help me? I lived in this village, in the orphanage, but it burned. Everyone left, but they didn’t take me. I don’t know how to find other people.” 

 

Niles folds his arms tighter and stops walking. Leo looks hesitant. More than before, even. Odin is sure he knows why. Although the truth of the matter is they would like to help in any way they can, it’s complicated. How can they help a homeless child who can't hear or read or write? They have no way to communicate with him. Except for Odin, who keeps using the signs he's learned in the lessons in his dreams. But his hands move fast, and so does his voice, when he says "You're in the presence of the prince of Nohr and his retainers! We will certainly help you!” 

 

The boy covers his ears again, and he shouts “Stop! Please? I can’t hear you.” 

 

It must be terrible. To suddenly lose his voice was earth-shattering, and Odin can only imagine that a child who was perfectly capable of hearing suddenly being plunged into silence must be horrifying. He takes a deep breath and he slows down. He does something more simple. He says his word, he nods his head, he forms his sign language. “Yes,” he says. “Yes.” 

 

Leo doesn’t argue, and neither does Niles. How can they, when that boy looks so relieved? He starts to sniffle and swipes at his tears with the dirty sleeve of his shirt. He looks so innocent, like that. He's not a demon, he was never a demon. He was a vision of a child in need, and Odin is sure that he was meant to see his face again. 

 

So Niles and Leo don’t argue, because they surely want the same thing that Odin does. They want to get him clothed and fed and bathed, let him stay someplace warm for the night. They want to help him, even if they can’t help him much more than to the next orphanage with a vacancy.

 

Odin walks closer and scoops him up to sit right on his hip. The boy gasps and swings his arms around Odin’s neck. He’s light—should he be so light? Odin can easily balance him on his hip with one arm, so he still chatters at him gently. Slowly, softly. He hopes it’s easy to read his lips. “I’ll teach you signs,” He promises. For good measure, he lifts his free hand and wiggles it. Odin’s heart is lighter just seeing the smile that blossoms on his face. “What is your name?”

 

“Forrest,” the boy answers. “My name is Forrest.  _ Thank you.”  _

 

_ … _

 

Forrest has long since been asleep. Odin carried him for a while, but when he began to snooze Leo insisted they let him sit up with him on the horse so he could rest. He’s been tucked against Leo’s chest since then. 

 

They’ve been on their way, with that detour resolved, but Odin is still baffled by the whole event. This part of his visions was real, and he’s found himself fixated on what else could be as well. “Milord,” he starts. 

 

“I’ve told Niles, and I’ll tell you as well, you don’t  _ have _ to call me that, Odin. Niles tells me he says it out of habit, and if that’s the case you may as well, but you’re going to be my husband. You may call me by my name whenever you like.” 

 

Niles bumps his shoulder into Odin’s gently while they walk. “It’s a hard habit to break.” 

 

“Er—yes, of course,” Odin admits. “But, more importantly, Leo I have a question. When you were researching the spirit pacts and their effects, was there much information on the subject?”

 

Leo frowns. “I brought the books with us,” He admits. “Lest we ever need them again. The effects that happened to my grandfather’s retainer were documented. We know what happened to you. Is something troubling you?” 

 

“Do you believe that… Well, that is, I saw Forrest. He was in several visions I had, and I always thought they were horrific imagery to be cast aside, but… It was in one of those visions that he led me to that burnt village, and that’s what led me to follow the path there today…” 

 

Niles slips his fingers through Odin’s. Odin looks down at their hands, but then he squeezes his hand in exchange. “Do you think you saw the future, Odin?” Niles asks.

 

“Very possible,” Leo mumbles. “You have always had a gift of foresight, Odin. You call it instinct but you’re nearly never wrong when you have those ‘gut feelings.’ When your magic was amplified by the spirit pact, who is to say that your gift of prophecy wasn’t amplified as well?” 

 

Oh. Yes, when Leo says that, he supposes it sounds possible. His aunt, the Lady Emmeryn, also was believed to have a gift of prophecy. The Exalted Bloodline used to brag of such a power. But now, more than ever, he’s tormented. 

 

Were his visions of the girl who called him father dreams or premonitions of a distant future? What about the little girl with the brand on her arm? What about the visions of the other boy, the one who screamed in pain? He can’t remember his voice. Maybe that was Forrest. If so, he doesn’t want to imagine he was in pain, not like that. 

 

“Odin,” Leo says firmly. Odin snaps out of his thoughts and looks at the worried expression Leo is wearing. “You’ll drive yourself mad trying to sort through what is real or fake. If you had visions of your future, forget them. Fortune-telling of any sort is nothing more than a hint wrapped in a clue. You should know that your future has yet to be written.” 

 

…

 

Several months later sees Forrest sitting alone on a large sofa in the front room of their quarters. His only company is a book of fairy tales and fables. He has his nightgown fanned out on the cushion like a flower so that his legs are safely tucked under it and safe from the chill of the room. Odin is almost surprised to see him there, but then he’s relieved. He slips into the room and settles down on the sofa with him. 

 

“Why are you here all by yourself?” He asks. Forrest looks up from the book when Odin sits down, and he watches each sign and the movement of Odin’s lips with a pleased smile. Like he’s not at all bothered that he’s been caught. “We were looking for you. To think! All along you were here—and you’ve already had your evening bath? You smell of soaps! How long has it been since you wandered off?” 

 

Forrest giggles. He moves his hands in the shape of words. Fluidly, practiced, he’s picked it up well. He can still talk, but the more he’s learned to do without it, the less he’s been using his voice. He can’t hear it himself, that is, and so it’s less important to him to try. They asked the most acclaimed healers in Nohr, but no one was able to restore his hearing.  _ I don’t like parties anymore. I can’t hear the music and no one seems to know how to talk to me. _

 

Well, Odin thinks that’s not fair. There are several people in the castle who can sign now—all of Forrest’s instructors and caregivers—and many others who would let him read their lips, but he doesn’t argue. He just nods at him. He doesn’t much want to stay at the party either. Today has been a wonderful, long day for them all. He would also prefer to be in pajamas and preparing for bed. 

 

Forrest prefers nightgowns in soft pinks and pastels. None of them have bothered to ask why. His hair is a little longer now, too. It’s grown out past his eyes, but he usually parts it so that his bangs aren’t in his face. Odin suspects he’ll want to grow it out. He doesn’t mind. None of them do. Life is too short to waste arguing about one’s taste in fashion.

 

“May I join you?” Odin asks. He's proud of the progress Leo and Niles have made on sign language, too. They were quick to ask for lessons, considering Odin was teaching Forrest anyway. Once they learned, they helped teach the staff, and in just a few months most everyone they trust with Forrest is capable of it. It makes Odin happy to see people so eager to learn something, especially something that means so much to them. Forrest nods his head yes and invites Odin to join him. 

 

Odin begins to shrug off the vest that he’s wearing. He drapes it over the table near the lounge and then he settles down with his arm draped around the back of the sofa. Forrest flashes him a brilliant smile. He’s just barely started reading over Forrest’s shoulder when  _ he _ gets caught. The door to the room clicks open and Odin peers up with a helpless smile.

 

“Odin, people will be missing you.” Leo uses signs when he talks too. He’s not actually talking to Forrest, but he still uses the signs. It’s so he can’t be left out of the conversation, and it makes Odin’s heart swell with pride every he or Niles does it. They include him, they love him. None of them expected him to become a pillar in their lives on the day that they found him, but once they got to know Forrest it was impossible to let him go. He’s their family, and he deserves only the best. 

 

Ah, but Odin is distracted. Leo rolls his eyes and a playful smile slips up one side of his face. “It  _ is _ our wedding reception, you know.” 

 

Niles is standing there beside him. He has his arms crossed but a gentle smile creeping over his lips. Leo pauses to look from Odin and then to Niles, but then he strolls closer to the sofa and leans over Forrest's other shoulder to get a look at the book. "Ah, this is one of my favorite fables," he says. Odin grins. Forrest smiles at him too and opens it wider in his lap so they can both read it with him.

 

Leo sits down on the other side of Forrest, and then, unsurprisingly, Niles joins them. He steps out of his shoes, peels off a few layers of stuffy I-just-got-married clothing, and then he lays down on the end of the sofa on his back with his head in Odin’s lap. He sighs, contently, but then looks up when Forrest gently taps his head to get his attention. 

 

_ Father, you can’t read like that, _ Forrest says. 

 

Niles picked the sign language up faster than any of them. Faster than Forrest, even. He hums a soothing noise that makes Odin’s heart feel warm and safe. A tiny smile spreads over Forrest’s face. Niles says,  _ Odin can read it to me _ .

 

Forrest nods his head. After that, he shifts around his position on the couch. It upsets everyone in the cuddle pile they’ve formed just a little bit, but no one complains. Forrest just wants to settle down and lean his head on Odin’s chest. He’s still the one holding the book, but he often lays like this when they read together. He’s said before that even though he can’t hear Odin’s voice, he can still feel the rumble of his chest and the beating of his heart. 

 

Odin loves that; he loves it very much. 

 

Leo curls up and settles with his head against Forrest’s arm. Once he’s comfortable, and sure he’s not too heavy of a weight on his son, he closes his eyes and listens, too. Odin reads aloud for them all, while Forrest follows along with the words on the page. 

 

For a short while, anyway. Only something close to fifteen minutes passes before he falls asleep, cuddled between them. When he speaks up, Leo sounds sleepy too. “It’s been a busy day,” He quietly says. 

 

“Kiddo has the right idea,” Niles echoes. He keeps his eye shut while Odin lowers his hand and plays with his hair. “No one would even notice if we didn’t go back.”

 

Odin starts to close the book, but Leo must have a change of heart from earlier because he argues gently. “No, Odin keep reading. I think Niles has made a fine point. Let’s stay.” 

 

So they stay. Leo comfortably cuddles against Forrest and Odin. Niles begins to snore quietly. Odin reads the triumphant tale of a songbird who couldn't sing but learns to make music in her own way. But even he drifts off to sleep, still eagerly awaiting the happy ending. 

 


End file.
